Take it from me (a proud non-reader), building a relationship with someone who reads is just about the worst choice you could make. There are so many red flags, almost too many to count (because there are a lot, not just because I can’t count very high). For your benefit, I will take my personal hellish experience dating a reader and relate it to you all to express the very solid and factual reasons why you should never, ever go down the road I did.
They Know Too Much
My ex was absolutely infuriating about this. She said that “reading books” increases your knowledge of historical people and events, logic and reasoning, and conversational skills… all things no one needs to know! There’s a reason we only use ten percent of our brains; most information out there is completely unnecessary. Your partner is probably taking the information they learn from “books” and using it to replace the actual important stuff (like how to cook and clean and fix the Wi-Fi). Do yourself a favor and hightail it outta there the moment you see your partner deep in thought. They’re probably learning something!
They Have Super High Expectations
Readers (especially romance readers) have the most insane expectations for a relationship. They think just because they read about a fictional character doing the dishes or holding the door open for their partner that, all of a sudden, we have to do that stuff? These books are really preventing us from doing the bare minimum, and frankly, I think it’s unrealistic. Grow up, readers!
You Can’t Cheat As Easily
This one is about those who read mystery or romance; guys, these people are insane! They will know immediately when you’re cheating on them. Apparently, they’ve “learned” from “books” what suspicious habits people have when cheating on their partners. I’m sorry; I guess coming home late every night and never letting my ex see my phone was a “suspicious habit?” Take it from me, folks; times have really changed.
They Only Like Boring Things
Want to buy a cool new gift for your partner’s birthday? Well, think again because instead of the 2024 RAM 1500 TRX truck with a 6.2-liter V-8 engine producing 702 horsepower and 35-inch tires mounted on 18-inch wheels with 15.0-inch front brakes, your partner probably just wants some boring book. My whiny ex was all like, “I didn’t even want this,” “You just bought me something you wanted,” and “I literally sent you a link for a $15 book, and you spent like $50,000 on a truck.” Ungrateful much?
Living Together Will Be Horrendous
When my partner moved in, she literally filled all of our bookshelves with books. If you succumb and let your partner do this, it will make your household look literate and well-read! Don’t you want your house to actually reflect the people living there? We don’t want people to get the wrong impression and think you are “studious” or “know how to read.” Additionally, if your partner reads only Kindle books, your house will become completely uncluttered and neat. Once again, don’t you want your house to reflect the fact that you live there?
Make sure you think about all the consequences when choosing a partner; if you find yourself stuck with a reader who is smart, romantic, polite, and super easy to shop for, know that I warned you!!
Check out our article about books that the Schnookstr community really wants banned!
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