One of the hardest things pet owners have to experience is the loss of their pet. It’s inevitable and we’re never ready for it. Our beloved companions might be here for a short time, but their impact is eternal — and we’re grateful for them. In the season of thanks, the Bookstr Team is honoring their pet angels by sharing what made them so special.
Trigger Warning: This article focuses on pet loss, which could be triggering to some readers. Proceed with caution.
They Mattered
On May 6th, 2021, two days before my birthday, my family and I lost our nearly 15-year-old schnauzer, Sansón. He was the last of five. That same month, a stray female cat we’d taken in, Mau, gave birth to precisely five kittens; not all of them lived long-term. Mau’s mate, Tiger, belonged to my grandparents, and I’d grown very attached to him and his brother Golfie over two years — and they to me. That same May of 2021, Tiger too passed away, which seemingly prompted his brother to take off shortly after. The following year, just shy of turning one, Mau and Tiger’s eldest kitten, Míu, went missing for over a month. It was one loss or scare after another after another after another. I felt every single one of those losses and each time I realized how lonely they were to grieve. Provided below is an Instagram post with a note I shared with an artist at the time of my grief.
In a 2023 USA Today article titled My dog died two months ago. Pet loss causes deep grief that our society ignores, writer Charles Trepany states that “Pain over the loss of an animal occupies a unique place in the realm of grief.” In the same article, Trepany shares his own story of pet loss and goes on to refer to it as a “disenfranchised grief.” He quotes pet loss grief counselor Beth Bigler, who says,
“[Pet loss] is a type of grief that isn’t openly acknowledged or socially mourned or publicly supported.”
Bigler also reveals that “This loss feels, for some people, worse than human loss,” adding,
“Of course, people feel guilty about saying that. But the proximity that our animals have, the intimacy that they share in our lives and the connection — the deep feelings that exist between guardians and their animals — make this type of loss especially hard.”
In the chaos of life, our animal friends are an unwavering source of love and comfort. While books give us refuge in fiction, pets are an anchor in our reality. The vacancy they leave when they depart never fills. They mattered, and they still do. To honor those eternal companions, I asked my Bookstr colleagues to share their memories with the pet angels still occupying their hearts.
Tug the Orange Tabby
“Tug taught me how terrible pet loss can be, but even more so, just how deep the emotions of animals go, and just how much a human can love a furry companion.”
I like to call Tug my guardian angel because he really was there when I needed him the most. He appeared, most magically and serendipitously, on our doorstep the morning after Halloween when I was perhaps seven or eight. He was tiny, cold, and very orange. Of course, we named him Pumpkin. But soon he became Tug, for no particular reason. And Tug grew larger and larger (reaching 25 pounds at one point) and oranger and oranger. He moved with us across states in the back of our van, and later, across the world in the hot belly of a plane. He was there after I finished elementary school, then middle school, then high school, and then, as I started college. He always had cuddles to spare, serving as the best twenty-five-pound weighted blanket you could ask for.
And after he met his untimely end and we laid him to rest behind our house, a bobcat came to the grave and dozed in the sun atop it, just as Tug would lounge in the sun. Tug taught me how terrible pet loss can be, but even more so, just how deep the emotions of animals go, and just how much a human can love a furry companion. Now, I have another round boy cat, Theodore. While the pair never got to meet, I like to imagine that Tug sent Teddy to me in his stead. In that way, he’s still my guardian angel, the best weighted blanket, and the best therapist I’ll ever know.
Fiona Hansen, Editorial & Outreach
Skyler the Jet Black Dog
“Skyler’s favorite spot was on the back of the couch near our heads. There’s still an indent from the specific side that he would lay on.”
I had my guardian angel for most of my life, since he was a puppy. He was always there with me when I was in elementary school, middle school, high school, and college. He loved to sniff everything on his walks; he would not run very often. He always got so excited to go on walks, but only ran when he was a little puppy. There were specific toys that were his favorites which we still have in a basket. He loved his stuffed hedgehog. My family still doesn’t know what specific breed he was, but he shared my mom’s birthday and he fit in with our family. He was a lap dog and loved sitting or laying on our laps when we sat on the couch. Skyler’s favorite spot was on the back of the couch near our heads. There’s still an indent from the specific side that he would lay on.
It was one of the hardest losses that I have gone through, but it was time. Towards the end, he got old fast and we made the decision. I loved him and he was the best dog and best companion. He was there for me during COVID and always laid near me on the floor when I was on my laptop doing online schooling. It was hard to think of a time when he was not with me. I still miss him every day and he is still my guardian angel, whom I think of often, and he was the best dog for our family.
Molly Ireland, Outreach and Editorial
Dundee, Australian Shepherd
“He was a sweet boy I could keep inside with me and was one of the best car-riding companions I ever had as a stay-at-home mom.”
Dundee was important to me for many reasons. Not only did I have to give up my bloodhound for adoption, but I had strong emotional troubles going on at that time. Dundee was older and had a calmer temperament. The adoption agency had a problem getting him adopted due to a bum leg. I attached to him immediately as someone broken too. He was a sweet boy I could keep inside with me and was one of the best car-riding companions I ever had as a stay-at-home mom. We had such a strong bond that I still mourn him three years later. To this day, I have no idea how or why he died and I still can’t go into the backyard. It’s where we buried him and I often revisit photos I have of him on my phone.
Blaise Senkel, Social and Editorial
Lulu, Hound Mix
“She had so much personality and boy could she fight — she’d walk around with her war scars from fighting off the mean possums that lived in my neighborhood and frightened me.”
I had my loveable and charisma-filled dog Lulu ever since I could remember up until about age twelve when she sadly had to be put down due to her pain and medical problems. She was probably my first heartbreak, as I was always so attached to her.
I always just wanted to cuddle her and probably even annoyed her (she was not a huge petting/cuddle-seeking dog as she preferred her personal space) and as a child I would follow her around the house, yard — you name it. She had so much personality and boy could she fight — she’d walk around with her war scars from fighting off the mean possums that lived in my neighborhood and frightened me. Though the end of her life was a bit of a tragic story, she will always be a wonderful and positive experience in my mind, and I see bits and pieces of her in my current dog Aleli, who also happens to be a dramatic and personable hound mix. Though we may miss our pets dearly, I am always grateful to have even got to enjoy years of my life with Lulu in it.
Kelly Severson, Video/Graphics Intern
Prince, Shihuahua
“…I crouched down and simply called his name and he literally sprinted into my arms!”
Prince was a cute, small dog that we adopted from the animal shelter when I was just 12 years old. Prince was half shitzu, half chihuahua, and was very energetic. Before adopting Prince, we had another dog for over a decade. The loss of our previous dog was pretty significant, taking us some time to be ready for another pet. I am so grateful to have had Prince throughout middle school, high school, college, and then a few years after. Prince was full of life, but age and time were against him in the end.
My favorite memory of Prince was when he was fairly new to our family. My 6th/7th grade class was outside on the field for PE, at the end of the day. At this time, parents and cars lined the street for pick up and I saw my mom’s car parked right along the curb, just on the other side of the chain link fence that held us in for PE. Prince had been sitting in the passenger seat and when he saw me, he jumped out the window!!! He instantly had the zoomies and began running back and forth! My mom got out of the car and was having a difficult time catching him, so I asked my teacher if I could go help my mom and she agreed! The sweetest moment came when I crouched down and simply called his name and he literally sprinted into my arms!
Lexi Dos Santos, Social & Editorial Intern
Ginger the Mastiff Ridgeback
“There’s a photo that comes up in my Snapchat memories every year of me at about 14 or 15 years old saying, ‘I just started crying thinking about how Ginger is going to die one day,’ and cry I did.”
In short, Ginger was perfect. I know everyone feels that way about their dogs, so call me basic but it’s just the truth. She was smaller than most Mastiffs, and didn’t inherit any of the drooling genes — lucky us! She loved to sleep under the blankets with her head on the pillow next to yours, and she was quite good at wiggling her way in there while you were sleeping.
After I moved away to go to school my parents sent me a photo of her laying with her head on our fireplace hearth, staring at my senior pictures that they had taken off the wall to repaint the living room. Of course, I cried. There’s a photo that comes up in my Snapchat memories every year of me at about 14 or 15 years old saying, “I just started crying thinking about how Ginger is going to die one day,” and cry I did. I was away at school and devastated that I wasn’t there when she passed peacefully laying by the fire with my parents and younger siblings. But my mom told me something I’ll never forget. She said, “It’s okay that you weren’t here in the very last moments, because you loved her her whole life, and she knows that.” It did help. But I’ll always miss her.
Orianna McDavid, Editorial Intern
Bear, Mixed-Breed
“I still keep a picture of him to remind me of the joy he brought to my life and volunteer at shelters that handle dogs with behavioral issues just like those of my wild baby.”
Bear wasn’t really mine, but I always cared for him as a puppy. He was fluffy and brown with a few behavioral quirks, but he was my loyal protector and friend. He would always stand by the door of whatever room I was in and wouldn’t move until I left. If he thought anyone was hurting me, he would often pull them away or place himself between us.
My favorite memory of Bear is teaching him to sit and roll over. Everyone said he would never learn manners, but, stubborn as I was, I was determined to teach him. It took an entire day of him staring at me awkwardly as I repeated “sit” more than a hundred times before he finally understood and obeyed. At the end of the day, I was so happy that I rushed to tell my aunts, and he came right behind me, jumping and wagging his tail. I may not have been the one who adopted him, but it felt like he was mine. However, as much as he was loving with me, he wasn’t very welcoming to the rest of my family, and it became a problem.
One day, when I came back from school, I didn’t see him anymore. I was told he had escaped, but I knew it wasn’t true. I cried for an entire afternoon, feeling guilty for not being there to protect him as he had always protected me. I still keep a picture of him to remind me of the joy he brought to my life and volunteer at shelters that handle dogs with behavioral issues just like those of my wild baby.
Alexia Rocha, Editorial & Graphics
If you’ve lost a pet recently, this holiday season might look different. Just know that whether your loss was a month ago, three years ago, or over a decade ago, there’s a community for you, and your grief is valid. To our loyal pets, thank you. We keep you; we cherish you; we love you.
Join the Bookstr team in celebrating our furry companions by clicking here.
To read about more heartwarming bonds, check out books that feature memorable friendships here.
