“I have loved you from the first time I held your hand,” he says as he slides a golden ring on her finger. The officiant declares them married, and when her husband leans in, his lips crush against hers. “Now I never have to let go.”
It’s 3 AM. You close the book, pull it to your chest, and stare at the wall for a while. Your heart is so full that it bursts and crumbles into a million pieces. Sighing, you realize you have fallen in love with a fictional character. Again.
Unfortunately, you’ve just read the final book with your beloved and can’t seem to get them out of your head. Heartsick and hopeless, you wander amongst the shelves of your local library like a Victorian ghost, searching in vain for something — anything — to fill the void in your soul.
Fear not, lovelorn reader. We at Bookstr share your pain and would like to share some tips and tricks on how to get over a bookish crush. Different methods work for different people, so feel free to experiment until you have healed and are ready to love once more.
Carry It Until I’m Over It
If the crush is bad enough, I’ll just carry the book or series around hoping people will ask me about it. After about the 27th time explaining, I’m usually over the crush and only see the red flags I missed before.
— Kristi Eskew, Editorial
Bury The Book (And My Feelings)
If the crush causes me to enter a book slump — the worst state of melancholy for a reader — I hold a funeral for the character. I put on my finest black attire, scour the internet for the most attractive fanart of my crush, tape said fanart to the cover, and bury the book in my backyard. By the time my cousin finishes playing “Taps” on his bagpipes, I’ve shed my tears and am ready to move on. Unfortunately, my neighbor has been threatening to call the HOA over a “gopher problem,” so I might have to find a new burial place soon.
— Cara Hadden, Editorial
Find The Red Flags
Sure, you can tell yourself that there is someone better out there for you, but when you’ve just dedicated a chunk of your time to crushing on this one character, moving on may not be easy. That’s why I find every little thing wrong with my book crush so that I feel nothing but cringe when I remember them. Some may say, “I can’t find anything wrong!”, and that’s when you gaslight your heart into believing that even a character’s good intentions are toxic so that you have justification to move on.
— Jhade Gales, Graphics
Become Extremely Delusional
If I have a book crush, I would write and imagine an entire love story for the character and me, how we meet, how we fall in love, and then we would have a really bad break up. I will become the most delusional person on earth, making videos with their quotes but with y/n as the person they are talking to. I would cry myself to sleep because of the break up. Our relationship would become so toxic that I have no tears left to cry. It would become so mad that I am forced to get over them.
— Lenyx Le, Graphics
Pretend They’re A Real Person In My Real Life
Oftentimes, a book crush is someone I would never actually go for in real life. Of course, their character is usually some sort of extreme stereotype that fits into multiple tropes at once, so the chances of meeting anyone like them in real life is limited anyway. If I’m feeling extra delusional or crazy about a character, I like to take a step back and force myself to reality.
I go over their basic character traits, hobbies, etc. and recognize what sort of real-person stereotypes they actually fall into. From there, I’m usually able to think of some ick for the character and they just don’t seem as appealing anymore. But I really only do this if I’ve gone off the deep end; it’s not a normal occurrence.
— Lauren Tabella, Editorial
Become Obsessed With The Crush
It’s pretty simple.
Don’t.
Write fanfiction instead and build a shrine.
— Sierra Jackson, Editorial
Burn, Baby, Burn
Write all of the reasons why you love them on a piece of paper. Then burn it. If that doesn’t work, try it again. And again. And again. Eventually, you’ll get so sick of this process your crush will fade.
— Danielle Tomlinson, Editorial
Become The Love Interest
Write a 50,000 word self insert fanfic…No, I will not be taking questions.
— Kaitlyn Gardineer, Editorial
Country Roads, Take Me Home…
Write a follow-up novel about how he stole your car, broke your heart, slept with your mom, and ran off with your dog. Kind of like a country song.
— Sam Barnette, Editorial
He’s Real To Me, Mom!
Just be delusional.
Because they do exist. What is a book crush even? It’s just a crush.
— Michelle Quinde, Social
Switch It Up, Love
Find another one. If I can’t get over a book crush, I read another book and fall in love with another guy! Then I’ll (usually) forget all about the first book crush. Unless it’s Aaron Warner. I’ll never replace him. I just yearn for him to be real and cry when I can’t find a man like him.
— Alexandra Mellott, Editorial
Add Them To The Harem
Book crush? I think you mean crushes. I have a harem of book men that do indeed exist, whether only in the bounds of my mind or not. My future husband will have to prepare for all of us to be a part of the relationship. However at this rate, I don’t think I’ll find anyone that meets my standards like all of these men do.
— Olivia Salamone, delusional love-struck from Editorial
Tantalizing or toxic, devoted or delusional, there are few experiences as magical yet heartbreaking as falling for a fictional character. To the readers willing to open their hearts to real feelings, while that bookish crush might not love you back, you’ve got a whole community who supports and loves you right here.
What are some tricks you use to get over a book crush? Let us know!
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