Tag: Self-development

Check out This Week’s Uplifting Self-Help Books!

Each week, Bookstr scans bestseller lists across the Internet to learn what people are reading, buying, gifting, and talking about most — just so we can ensure consistent, high quality recommendations. This week’s nonfiction picks are new self-development picks that will inspire you to be all you can be.

 

5. Atomic Habits by James Clear

 

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No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving—every day. James Clear, one of the world’s leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results. If you’re having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn’t you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don’t want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you’ll get a proven system that can take you to new heights.

 

4. Decluttering at the Speed of Life by Dana K. White

 

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In Decluttering at the Speed of Life, decluttering expert and author Dana White identifies the mind-sets and emotional challenges that make it difficult to declutter. Then, in her signature humorous approach, she provides workable solutions to break through these struggles and get clutter out—for good!

But more than simply offering strategies, Dana dives deep into how to implement them, no matter the reader’s clutter level or emotional resistance to decluttering. She helps identify procrasticlutter—the stuff that will get done eventually so it doesn’t seem urgent—as well as how to make progress when there’s no time to declutter.

 

3. Live Big by Ajit Nawalkha

 

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The key to achieving what you set out for—in business and in life—doesn’t lie in perfectly executed strategy. The greatest tool you have is your own mindset—it determines your ability to adapt and persevere. And, like any other tool, you can employ it to your advantage. While most aspiring entrepreneurs think the next business strategy will manifest the life they desire, successful entrepreneurs know it’s the emotional and mental “shifts” that will bring you closer to your goals. No one is better equipped to explore these shifts than Ajit Nawalkha, cofounder of Mindvalley and one of the world’s leading entrepreneurs and business coaches. In Live Big: A Guide to Passion, Practicality, and Purpose, Nawalkha shares 25 shifts—changes in your mental, physical, emotional, or even spiritual state—that will propel you on your road to success.

 

2. You Are A Badass Every Day by Jen Sincero

 

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For anyone who has ever had trouble staying motivated while trailblazing towards badassery, You Are a Badass Every Day is the companion to keep you fresh, grateful, mighty, and driven. In one hundred exercises, reflections, and cues that you can use to immediately realign your mind and keep your focus unwavering, this guide will show you how to keep the breakthroughs catalyzed by Sincero’s iconic books You Are a Badass and You Are a Badass at Making Money going. Owning your power to ascend to badassery is just the first step in creating the life you deserve—You Are A Badass Every Day is the accountability buddy you can keep in your back pocket to power through obstacles, overcome the doubts that hold you back from greatness, and keep the fires of determination roaring while you reach your goals.

 

1. The Minimalist Home by Joshua Becker

 

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A popular minimalist blogger and author of The More of Less shows you how to methodically turn your home into a place of peace, contentment, and purposeful living with this book: The Minimalist Home. One of today’s most influential minimalist advocates takes us on a decluttering tour of our own houses and apartments, showing us how to decide what to get rid of and what to keep. He offers both practical guidelines for simplifying our lifestyle at home and addresses underlying issues that contribute to over-accumulation in the first place. The purpose is not just to create a more inviting living space. It’s also to turn our life’s HQ—our home—into a launching pad for a more fulfilling and productive life in the world.

 

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Here are Bookstr’s Self-Development Recommendations!

Each week, Bookstr scans bestseller lists across the Internet to learn what people are reading, buying, gifting, and talking about most—just so we can ensure consistent, high quality recommendations. This week’s nonfiction picks are new self-development picks that can improve your quality of life! Dig in!

 

 

5. ‘No happy endings’ by Nora McInerny 

 

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No Happy Endings by Nora McInerny is a book for people living life after life has fallen apart. It’s a book for people who know that they’re moving forward, not moving on. It’s a book for people who know life isn’t always happy, but it isn’t the end: there will be unimaginable joy and incomprehensible tragedy. As Nora reminds us, there will be no happy endings—but there will be new beginnings.

 

4. ‘Range’ by David Epstein

 

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Range by David Epstein is all about learning from failure. This book makes a compelling case for actively cultivating inefficiency. Failing a test is the best way to learn. Frequent quitters end up with the most fulfilling careers. The most impactful inventors cross domains rather than deepening their knowledge in a single area. As experts silo themselves further while computers master more of the skills once reserved for highly focused humans, people who think broadly and embrace diverse experiences and perspectives will increasingly thrive.

 

3. ‘How to do nothing’ by jenny Odell

 

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How to To Do Nothing by Jenny Odell argues the case of doing nothing, especially in the digital age of distraction and people vying for your attention. This is is an action plan for thinking outside of capitalist narratives of efficiency and techno-determinism. Provocative, timely, and utterly persuasive, this book is a four-course meal in the age of Soylent.

 

 

2. ‘The Life Changing magic of tidying up’ by Marie Kondo

 

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The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo is a detailed book about how to declutter your house from its infernal mess. With detailed guidance for determining which items in your house “spark joy” (and which don’t), this international bestseller featuring Tokyo’s newest lifestyle phenomenon will help you clear your clutter and enjoy the unique magic of a tidy home—and the calm, motivated mindset it can inspire.

 

1. ‘Belong’ by Radha Agrawal

 

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Belong by Radha Agrawal is about building a community with like minded people in the digital age when people feel more isolated than ever. A book that’s equal parts inspiring and interactive, and packed with prompts, charts, quizzes, and full-color illustrations, Belong takes readers on a two-part journey. Part one is Going IN—a gentle but intentional process of self-discovery and finding out your true energy levels and VIA (values, interests, and abilities). Part two is Going OUT—building on all that you’ve learned about yourself to find those few special people who feed your soul, and discovering, or creating, the ever-widening groups that align with your aims and desires.

 

 

 

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5 Ways to Ignore Everybody and Finally Be Happy

This past September, my teenagers were bickering with each other so much — okay, real talk, actually they were complete and total pre-frontal cortex psychopaths — that I couldn’t even get them to stand still for the picture that they knew I wanted to take, that I’ve moved heaven and earth as a working mother to be present to take, that I’ve taken for thirteen years. Every first day. For thirteen years.

They were horrendous to each other. They were horrendous to me. And, yes, I get it. They were anxious. It’s the first day. But their behavior towards each other and towards me was inexcusable in its lack of civility, humanity, or even just basic kindness. I stood stunned, questioning every sacrifice I’d made, and especially all those sacrifices I chose not to make.  I’d fallen prey to that insidious trap of the comparison game, the one where we define our own success through other people, not just on social media, but in life, as parents and in our work (whether paid or unpaid).  Oh, what would become of me if I didn’t post a photo? I made it about I lost my head, and let them have it at the top of my lungs. And then we drove to school —oh, what a treat to be able to be there for these important moments! — in stony silence, me (not typically a crier) choking back tears the entire way.

 

The Cage Match of Comparison

We run, walk, or even blindly stagger through life, collecting piles of rocks labeled “the right job” and “the right vacation” and “the right spouse” and drop them in our backpacks, running faster and faster on the treadmill of success, and then we wonder: If I’ve done all the right things, as defined by everyone else, why do I feel so burdened, so heavy, so stuck? We’ve stepped foot into the cage match of comparison, and the minute we did, each and every one of us lost.

Here’s why: It’s hard to grab hold of your own goals and dreams —to feel fulfilment in success—when we’ve handed over that very definition of success to someone else.  The solution is easier than we think. It’s as simple as ignoring everybody and their mistaken assumptions of what will actually make you happy.  Yes, I know… ignoring everybody isn’t all that easy, but here are the best ways to do just that:

Don’t give a vote to people who shouldn’t even have a voice.

Let’s face it: most of the people who give you advice — telling you to slow down, take smaller risks, dream a little more realistically — are doing so from a place of fear and anxiety, not about you life but about their own.  Stop letting your audacity be constrained by the limits of other people’s imaginations. Politely excuse yourself from taking every opinion as fiat, weighing them all with equal measure, and allow yourself to be your own dog, run your own race, carve your own path. And all those voices questioning your choices and telling you what you should do and need to do? They simply don’t get a vote—unless you give it to them. And that includes that voice inside your own head.

It’s time to say “Screw the Joneses.” 

When we play the comparison game, we all lose. Social media puts us in a position where we unwittingly judge everyone else’s highlight reel through our own klutzy bloopers outtakes. Of course we look like we don’t have it all together. Of course we feel like we should just do more of whatever it is that the brightest, shiniest friend is doing. Of course we’ll have what she’s having.  But here’s the kicker: You can’t be insatiably hungry for someone else’s goals. And you won’t be satisfied by them, either. Let’s stop, once and for all, believing the hype, and stop hoping that “I’ll be happy when” and decide what will make us happy now. The journey is long, waiting is for suckers.

 

Realize that your fourth grade teacher was wrong about you. 

Back in middle school, we were taught to pursue the gold stars, get the good grades, and shine across the board. We had no say in the skills that got rewarded; and often what we were rewarded for was different from what we loved. So, rather than picking a path based on what makes us special—what we like, what we do well, and where we shine—most of us are forced to pick our path early, based on values attached by others and on interests that aren’t our calling. Remember that fourth grade teacher who said that you should become a doctor, a lawyer, an accountant? They possessed no crystal ball, and yet we internalized their notions as predictions rather than simply suggestions. What if, just what if, that prediction based on nothing more than anecdotal information gathered at a specific moment in time, when we still let our mothers cut our hair and pick out or picture day outfits, was wrong?

 

 

Believe that Ambition is not a dirty word.

Ambition has gotten a bad rap of late. It’s a dirty word—even more so if you are a woman. (Oh, she’s so ambitious!) Part of the reason we’ve lost ownership of our unspoken dreams — those dreams so big and so scary and so exciting that we dare not say them out loud — is that we’ve been persuaded to allow our ambition to be subsumed into something that is more socially acceptable: faux humility.

But, I’d ask you this: How do you want to raise your family? Why do you want to get ahead? What do you want to do with that power? Do you want to change your family, your community, your country, your world? Do you want to make a mark, large or small, on this earth? What kind of life do you want to live?

What do you want your legacy to be? If being in that elevated position, with that increased salary and that greater voice of leadership, allows you to make more of an impact on the very calling that you hold dear, it’s more than just your ambition. It’s your responsibility.

 

Gather your “framily.” 

I’ve come to understand that in order for your life to feel right for you, it has to actually be right for you. The most powerful way to insulate yourself from the misguided, happiness eroding (and often uninvited) opinions of others is to stop doubting your own damn self, and that comes from having the confidence in the choices you make and the chances you take. And, if you can’t find that on your own, it’s time to call a meeting of your “framily,” that combination of friends and family that see your greatness, even if you don’t yet. Tell them what you want to do, where you are stuck, and what you think is in your way. And then let them help you walk through the walls, real or perceived that are holding you back.

Taking My Own Advice

I had achieved the type of enviable on-paper success, because I checked all the right boxes along that path— someone else’s path— and when I turned around and demanded that my kids perform like trained monkeys because I happened to be there for that one shining moment, it was obvious that I was still trying to make it about me. After spending the day considering all the ways I’d punish them — make them wear a giant t-shirt with two head holes, drop them twenty miles from the house and make them work together to get home, and other various social-services-on-my-doorstep type child abuse fantasies — I decided to do something different: I decided to give them a do-over.

I sat them down at dinner and I laid out how their behavior came across, how it affected those around them, and how it reflected on them and the people they hope to become. I told them about how I tried to create a life that allowed me to be there in those moments, but that I failed to see those moments through their eyes as well.  I told them that, rather than punishing them, I wanted them to consider overnight the relationship they wanted to have with each other and me, and what kind of person they were when they were at their best. I let them try again, and I allowed myself the permission to make their behavior situational to the morning and not definitional to myself as a mother.  Which made me wonder, how often are we defining our success through someone else’s lens? How often are we letting other people dictate what happiness should mean to us? How often are we letting the reactionary behavior of others decide our value, our path, our own actions when, really, most people in uncomfortable situations act like teenage boys without fully-formed frontal lobes?

I gave them a do-over. I have myself one, too. And, together we found a state of grace again.

Happy Second Day of School from my zoo to yours!

 


 

Laura Gassner Otting is the author of Limitless: How to Ignore Everybody, Carve Your Own Path, and Live Your Best Life.  Want to live a limitless life? Take her quick quiz at http://www.LimitlessAssessment.com/  to see what’s holding you back, and what you can do about it.

Improve Your Lifestyle With Our Top Nonfiction Picks!

Each week, Bookstr scans bestseller lists across the Internet to learn what people are reading, buying, gifting, and talking about most — just to make sure you’re out there living your absolute best life. This week’s nonfiction picks center around the topic of self-development books, which showcase how you can improve your health, quality of life, and more with these great reads. Listen: we’re all trying to keep it together. But, with the right tools, staying on our game doesn’t have to be such a daunting task. Let’s dive into our picks and take a look!

 

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5. The Science of Self-empowerment by Gregg Braden

The Science of Self-Empowerment by Gregg Braden is about applying the advanced sense of awareness and spirituality that monks, nuns, and mystics have to our daily lives! Incorporating both scientific and philosophical perspectives, this book helps one achieve a form of spirituality that encourages true growth. Using real-world science to ground its claims, this self-help book that will find you rising to new heights and maybe even centering yourself like the worlds most spiritually-oriented people do.

 

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4. Do it Scared by Ruth Soukup 

Do It Scared by Ruth Soukup is for anyone who feels like they’re stuck in a rut or not taking the chances they really want to. The book helps you identify the source of your fears and tackle them with detailed, hands-on exercises. It lets you not only develop a plan but also, and perhaps more importantly, have the means and method to push yourself toward achieving your goals. This book contains the message that life is about taking chances and will absolutely help you take the first steps toward a better existence.

 

A man stands on a rock casting his hand into the darkness

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3. Turning Dreams into Reality by Yuval Tabib

Turning Dreams Into Reality by Yuval Tabib is based on experiences of the author and how Tabib made their dreams ‘truly’ come true. It’s hard work, but this book has a lot of answers that will make your existential problem-solving a more enjoyable experience. Drawing on theories from physics and Quantum Theory, this book has the answers to make you bend the world around you rather than let it control your life. Though actually achieving your dreams is certainly never an easy feat, purchasing this book certainly will be! Go out and go for it.

 

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2. Life Admin by Elizabeth Emes 

Life Admin by Elizabeth Emes is about managing one’s life and keeping precious moments from slipping by. The author, Elizabeth Emes, is a working mother with two children who realizes one day that her life is being overwhelmed by all that she has to do. In a moment of epiphany, it dawns on her that she needs to take better control of her own time, and so she offers all her struggling readers tips of how she learned to manage it. This book explores labor and how it chokes our lives while also showing us how to reduce labor… or at least reduce its negative impact on our lives.

 

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1. Own your Everyday by Jordan Lee Dooley

Own Your Everyday by Jordan Lee Dooley is about sharing her life experiences. She’s accidentally started a small business; embarrassed herself onstage during talks; and, like most of us, has wasted time caught up in her own anxiety. She’s had a broad range of life experiences, both good and bad, and she’s become an inspiration to young people (especially women) the world over. Now, she shares tips for overcoming obstacles and redefining success, all based on concrete stories of her own experiences.

 

 

 

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Improve Your Quality of Life With Our Self-Development Nonfiction Picks!

Each week, Bookstr scans bestseller lists across the Internet to learn what people are reading, buying, gifting, and talking about most — just so we can ensure consistent, high-quality recommendations. This week’s nonfiction picks center around the theme of self development books, showcasing how you can improve your health, quality of life, and more with these great reads. What are they? Let’s dive in and take a look!

 

5. Girl Stop apologizing by Rachel Ellis

 

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Girl Stop Apologizing is a wake up call to women: stop apologizing! In this groundbreaking book, Rachel Ellis asks women to stop defining themselves in terms of other people, making themselves subject to the whims of employees, bosses, and family. Instead, women should define themselves on their own terms and try to achieve what makes them truly happy. This book goes over the adjustments women need to make to. their lives and Rachel Ellis overs tips to get women toward a more ideal lifestyle.

 

4. Can’t Make this Stuff up by Susannah B. Lewis

 

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Can’t Make This Stuff Up by Susannah B. Lewis, who made her name online with her hysterical, up front videos that have a comedic, yet wise sensibility of the world. In this book, she recounts her absurd experiences to growing up in a small Tennessee town, recounting funny stories that helped shape her outlook on life. And through it all, Susannah kept her faith to God, learning to balance her beliefs with her life. This is a hilarious memoir with funny stories that showcase how to put a positive spin on life’s bad experiences and grow from them. It’ll teach you some lessons even while you’re cracking up.

 

3. A Walking Life by Antonia Malchik

 

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A Walking Life by Antonia Malchik is a book about using walking to reconnect with our world. Thanks to cars and modern technology, we spend more and more of our lives sedentary than ever before. But walking is what our species was designed for and we derive emotional connection from our spaces, the people around us, and our own mental health through the act of walking. Stimulating and satisfying, this book shows how essential walking is to our lives and how to incorporate it into your routine more often.

2. The Miracle Equation by Hal Elrod 

 

 

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The Miracle Equation by Hal Elrod uncovers a real life formula to help with success. The equation is Unwavering Faith + Extraordinary Effort = Miracles. By having faith in anything you desire then making great efforts to achieve that goal, you will never fail to reach your goals. With this book, you’ll learn how to manage your emotions, turn off your stress responses, and overall, be a more positive person that will help you gain true success in the real world. It’s not a magic equation but it works.

 

1. A Love letter to life by Jeremy And Audrey Roloff

 

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A Love Letter to Life by Jeremy and Audrey Roloff share their experiences of falling in love and more importantly, learning to make that love work. By telling their own love story, they hope to showcase the challenges and joys of a young couple living together. They share stories leading up to the journey to their wedding day. It wasn’t easy, full of bumps and bad choices but the two showcase that they got through it all and now, they hope to inspire you to do the same when you find your soulmate.

 

 

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