Oh the Hunger Games. Truly the best of the pack from the dystopian craze, at least in my opinion. It had everything. Fire, social commentary, death, crazy outfits. More movies than you can count. It’s been a while, but I know we’re still hype, and the second Mockingjay movie came out four years ago today, so let’s open some old wounds and have some laughs.
I’m Just Saying
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Look. If we were married, we would live in the same place, and therefore we’d have tons of time to work on the project. Just smart thinking, right? The only group project anyone ever wants to do. Yeah, this part of the story was insanely depressing, but don’t we all sometimes feel like we’re tap dancing just a few inches ahead of death? Just me? And if you’re asking someone to marry you in literally any other situation, you need to look happier about it. Just a tip.
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The Hunger Games didn’t invent killing all your characters and breaking everyone’s hearts. If anything, The Hunger Games was more metal about it, because those books were directed at a younger audience. I mean, maybe younger people thank I think watch GOT, but the audience for this was potentially young. I was a teenager when the last book came out, probably, but imagine reading it and being Prue’s age, younger. Rooting for her. Too soon?
Advice vs. Execution
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If it ain’t me. He’s just lucky he didn’t fall over. I know the act natural trope is crazy overused, but I just can’t be mad when it’s always so funny. As someone who’s never succeeded at seeming unbothered in my life, I can just relate on a really deep level. Sure, I’ve never gotten to the point of wearing a white suit about it, but I did once back into a table and fall over trying to act calm and professional. That might just be a me thing. Peeta does look awkward, though. Maybe because that collar’s clearly stabbing him.
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Look, I like to think I’d say to hell with the capital too, but at the same time, cushy job, probably some crazy hats, literally more food than you can eat… Sure, it worked out for him, but he really rolled the dice, didn’t he? For most of the rebellion it was like, hmm, do we fight or do we accept death? They could only profit. Maybe he saw an opportunity, maybe he was just a really good dude deep down, but his character really shows you the limits of first person narrative.
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*air horn sound* Alright, it’s probably not that funny. I just love it when people laugh really hard and I don’t get it like that. Look at the reaction image! Is it that funny to someone? Is it ironic laughter? Either way I’m amused. I also have a bunch of questions about snow. He was basically omnipotent, and he couldn’t make that work for him. For all he seemed clever in the books, I really don’t know how he let himself get killed by an excited crowd. What a fall from grace.
Once upon a time, we reported that Draco Malfoy himself, Tom Felton, had attended the opening at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Orlando and joined AOL’s In The Know for a game of ‘Fact or Fanfiction?’ and, in the standout moment from the Q and A, Tom Felton was asked: What did he think of Draco’s relationship to Harry Potter?
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Now anyone with even a passing glance to the franchise would see Draco and Harry a simple rivalry, a tale for the ages, but Tom Felton said, I’m quoting AOL here, “Harry was constantly crushing on Draco…He just couldn’t hide it.”
Let’s look at the facts:
Draco and Harry do definitely have some tension going on.
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With this in mind we’ve decided to give you, dear readers, twelve literary couples that happened in an alternative universe. Taking twenty-four characters from all across literature, from different book series to classic standalone novels (copyright be damned!), we’ve compiled these characters into eleven distinct (and surely steamy) relationships that would have totally worked out…for the characters, at least. Trust us, we’re chemists here.
No more sparkling vampires, now Twilight‘s Bella Swan is getting an upgrade. Let’s face it: There’s a reason Bram Stoker called this novel Draculaand not Harker. Dracula’s got style, he’s got nice clothes, he’s not charm oozing from everyone pore.
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Heck, if Bella says “No, I’m married” then I’m asking Dracula out to get a nice love bite.
Far before Twitter decided to give us the #givecaptainamericaaboyfriend fan campaign, we had the comic books. See Bucky died, Steve Rogers became a Commie smasher, and then the Commie smasher was retconned, and then the real Steve Rogers was thawed out from the ice.
Image Via The Mary Sue
But Bucky remained dead, and Steve was inconsolable in his grief over his best friend and partner in crime throughout the decades of Captain America comics. In fact, it was one of the most foremost elements of his character
Fans looked at this and took the small hop and believed that Steve’s profound sense of loss than met the eye
So Bucky came back. In fact, he came back as the Winter Soldier in a comic book called The Winter Soldier, and ever since then we’ve been clamoring for Steve and Bucky to get a little closer.
They’re perfect for each other. The two buddies have been with each other since the beginning and will continue to stay together “until the end of the line”. They’re both “men out of time” from 1930s Brooklyn and are war buddies with great rapport who totally get along. They have so much in common.
At least go on a date and see if there’s anything there.
We have Peter Pan‘s Captain Hook, and this man has been through a lot. Yes, he’s trying to track down and kill Peter Pan like he’s an animal, but Peter Pan is an animal! This boy cut off his hand and fed it to a crocodile. Wicked, evil, and savage beyond belief.
Gregory ‘The Man with the Pecks’ Peck as Captain Ahab / Image Via The Guardian
Then we have Moby Dick‘s Captain Ahab who, like James Hook, wants to track down an animal whose savaged ships of all sorts.
But would they be searching for these monsters if they had, you know, found each other? Could their killer eyes turn into ones of passion and love if they only looked into each other’s eyes?
We here at Bookstr call out in a resounding, ‘YES!’
Charles Dickens’ gave us Great Expectations, which us the tragic story of Miss. Havisham. Left at the altar as a young lady, she has preserved her house as it was on her wedding day and lived there ever since, shut away from the world. She has a heart of gold, but no one has treated it well.
Look at those sultry eyes/Image Via Pinterest
Harper Lee gave us To Kill A Mocking Bird, which introduced the world to Boo Radley. Our Boo has lived in a house since he was a child, hidden from the world, but he has a heart of gold, giving young Scout a jacket on a cold autumn day.
If these two shut-ins have closed their doors to the world, would they open their doors for each other? Boo Radley most certainly wouldn’t leave Miss. Havisham at the altar, and Miss. Havisham wouldn’t let our precious Boo feel unwelcomed.
Now this pairing might not be great for the world at large, but they would be great for each other. Both live in fantasy world, the authors who created them were in real life great friends, and both crave ultimately power.
While both skilled in the powers of magic, it wouldn’t take magic to get these two working side by side.
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Imagine it: the White Witch would kill all the lions and the hero in the land, freezing them in ice just in time…
Carlo Collodi’s Pinocchiogrows every time he lies, and he’s made of wood, so lie a few times and cut off the excess, and Voldemort doesn’t have to be called He-Who-Must-Not-Have-A-Nose.
Image Via Harry Potter Wiki – Fandom
Yes, Voldemort is a racist and a tyrant who thirsts for power more than a camel thirsts for water, but Pinocchio isn’t the pinnacle of innocence. After all, there’s a reason he’s cursed to have his nose grows every time he lies.
Plus, if he and Voldemort got together, Pinocchio can use his nose for…
Prince Eric isn’t a good fit for Hans Christie Andersen’s The Little Mermaid. He has legs, Ariel is half-fish, and if she gets together with him then she has to abandon her family. That’s a bad move, Ariel.
Aw, he’s holding him / Image Via Pinterest
But if she wants to take a walk on the wild side and still remain in the ocean, she can always go with the shark from Peter Benchley’s Jaws. Call him what you will (I call him Bruce, but others have called him Jaws or Sharkie or even Craig), but he knows his way around the wide ocean and can show Ariel a whole new world under the sea.
Ah, they always say there’s plenty of fish in the sea, but at least these two fish found each other. Maybe that’ll be the new plot for the new Disney remake!
Mrs. Robinson from Charles Webb’s 1963 novella The Graduate is trapped in a loveless marriage. She’s only married to her husband because she got pregnant and needed to avoid a scandal, and thus she hooks up with young Benjamin Braddock. But Benjamin is only into her because he’s bored. He doesn’t love her.
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Oedipus from the seminal play Oedipus Rex has a thing for older women. Yes, he didn’t know he was married to his mom, but she was still older than him. So maybe we can avoid the whole I-gotta-pluck-out-my-eyes thing and just have Oedipus meet up and see where things go with Mrs. Robinson. She’s old enough to be his mom, and that should be enough for dear old Ed.
This goes beyond the fact that ‘Katniss’ kind of, sort of, sounds like ‘cat’ and the Cheshire Cat is, well, a cat.
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For one, Katniss from Suzanne Collins’ The Hunger Games never really loved Peta. Two, Cheshire Cat from Lewis Caroll’s Alice in Wonderland knows his way around the block and would have helped her big time before, during, and after those pesky Hunger Games.
Plus, the Cheshire Cat is funny, and you know what they say….