Tag: Jane Eyre

Literary Canon Update

Have you ever been given a reading list that’s written, translated, and selected exclusively by and for men? Odds are you’ve rarely seen any that aren’t. If you want to appreciate the cannon while also living in a world where women exist, this is the list for you. These books and translations are some of the best and most lauded of all time, and yes, they’re by women.

It was, I must confess, a little hard to compile. The Odyssey was first translated by a woman only in 2017! But don’t despair. It’s all here for the taking.

 

The Iliad and the Odyssey

 

Homer’s epics have been translated MANY times, but these, by Caroline Alexander and Emily Wilson, respectively, set an incredible standard.

 

The Iliad

 

 

Close as can be to the ancient Greek, this translations has garnered heaping praise. “[T]he guard has changed, and a new gold standard has appeared”, said New Criterion at the volume’s publication. This edition even manages to retain the original line numbers from the Greek.

 

The Odyssey

 

 

This work, too, matches the original Greek as closely as possible. “A staggeringly superior translation―true, poetic, lively and readable, and always closely engaged with the original Greek”, said Harvard classics professor Richard F. Thomas. Iambic pentameter imitates the lyricism of the original Greek, and the volume also includes translation guides and maps.

 

 

Antigonik and An Oresteia

 

 

For both of these it is possible to turn to Anne Carson, a Canadian translator and classics professor. Carson’s translations are modern, elegant, and never condescending. In stead of translated, the works seem brought into the light, with all their strangeness and fierceness intact.

 

 

Jane Austen

 

How is it that Jane Austen, often the only woman on a reading list, is still under hyped? I had a guy in a bar tell me once that if people like Austen it’s because they haven’t read a lot of books. He really said that. Family conflict, human stories, and scathing humor makes Austen worth reading, with characters you really will love, and hate.

 

Pride & Prejudice

 

It’s a staple for a reason, and if you’re not sure you’ll relate to these people’s problems, you’re wrong. Fuckboys, impending poverty, poor decisions, and character growth you can get behind. Plus, it may be a period piece, but people still love their sisters. You’ll relate.

 

 

Jane Eyre

 

 

Another classic people want to avoid, but it has everything: deaths, fire, lies, weddings, blindness. I wouldn’t exactly call Jane a relateable character, but she’s understandable, I think, when you see everything she’s been through. And she’s incredibly decisive.

 

 

 

Images via Amazon 

Seven Spectacular Jane Eyre Memes

Jane Eyre is a wonderful, compelling book. It’s also silly, competitive, and bonkers insulting. Let’s make it even sillier with the best the nonsense internet has to offer.

 

 

So you get this job in the middle of nowhere. Sure, they didn’t give you a lot of details, but at least nothing else is weird about it, and your new boss is super nice. Your name is not Jane Eyre.

 

Image via Tumblr

 

Life’s hard for an orphan, but Jane isn’t really one to complain, she kind of just takes it as it comes. It’s just as well, because even aside from her aunt hating her, people don’t seem to feel the need to be very nice to her, even our ‘hero’ and the rest of the people she meets at work.

 

 

Image via WordPress

 

But boy do they. And she does too. Get some self confidence, girl! Sure, Rochester might not flirt like a normal person, but that’s no reflection on you. Being constantly downtrodden doesn’t mean you can’t live your best life! Why, when I was your age, I hadn’t received any proposals of marriage, and you have two! Sure, one is your cousin, and the other is already married, but ‘plain’ is either false or irrelevant. Mostly.

 

 

Image via The Bibliofile

 

We need a spin off. Did anyone else have about a million questions about Blanche? She’s pretty and popular, sure, and Rochester nearly marries her, but from Jane’s perspective, she’s sort of a force of nature. Personally, I want to know more.

It’s like things can never be easy for Jane. Even when she gets what she wants it goes sideways.

 

 

Image via Paste Magazine

 

So fun! Sure, it’s a bit of a rocky start, but marriage is complicated. I think those crazy kids can make it. Probably. If there’s something crazy that brings them back together. But what are the chances of that?

 

 

Image via Tumblr

 

We’re talking ARSON. We’re talking FALSE IMPRISONMENT. We’re talking BLINDNESS. How does Rochester feel so guilty but also act so cold? The man’s an enigma. Guilty as he may feel about Bertha, though, he moves on fast. You didn’t have to be so weird this whole time, man! You could’ve been happy!

 

 

Image via Twitter

 

I’d love to know what’s going on in that guy’s head. I sort of picture it like beauty and the beast where he’s just angry in some room alone, slamming doors.

Lot’s of ups and downs, but all’s well that ends well (is this a happy ending?), I guess.

 

 

Featured image via The Bibliofile 

10 Fictional Schools Even Worse Than Ones We Went To

The back to school season is always difficult for those of us still enrolled in the education system, however we really don’t have it all that bad. And there’s nothing quite like books to make our lives feel just a little less sucky in comparison.

Here are ten fictional schools that we would never want attend, in order from least bad to the absolute baddest.

 

 

10. Wayside School (Wayside school Series)

Wayside School is Falling DownImage via Scholastic

 

There is no way in hell that Wayside School is up to OSHA code. It’s literally falling down.

Plus, none of the kids in this school learn anything. Sure it’s fun to muck around in class every once and a while, but these kids are learning math without numbers and being turned into apples by evil witch teachers.

Call me old fashioned but that environment doesn’t seem very conducive to learning.

 

9. Rosewood High (Pretty Little LIars)

Rosewood HighImage via Pretty Little Liars Wiki

 

Rosewood High has all the average high school stressors. There’s sexuality to figure out, eating disorders to cling to, and teachers to be assaulted by.

But what really puts Rosewood on the map? The blackmail and murder. A lot of it. So, so much.

 

8. Thomas Ewen Consolidated High School (Carrie)

Carrie at promImage via imdb

 

This particular school is a bit different. It’s not Carrie’s school that’s awful, it’s her fellow students. Carrie’s peers relentlessly cruel, and the teachers don’t really seem to give a damn.

If you were to attend this school you might get a couple tampons chucked your way, which is pretty mean, but not deadly.

Definitely stay in on prom night though…

 

7. Pencey Prep School (Catcher in the Rye)

Catcher in the RyeImage via Amazon

 

If you’ve ever toured at a boarding school or college, you might be familiar with schools like Pencey Prep. The website is sleek, the brochures are long and convincing, and the images all show students having the time of their lives sitting in class or enjoying their extracurriculars.

Then you get there and it’s raining, the classrooms still have those televisions on rolling carts, and there’s no clubs to speak of.

How phony is that…

 

6. Lowood Institution (Jane Eyre)

An interpretation of LowoodImage via WatchingJane

 

Jane Eyre is sent to Lowood Institution as a punishment from her cruel aunt, Sarah Reed.

If the starvation, cruel discipline, and threadbare clothes weren’t punishment enough, holding on to your best friend desperately as she dies of consumption probably fits the bill.

Students attending this school today are definitely gonna want to get vaccinated before the school year starts.

 

 

5. Prufrock Preparatory School (A Series of Unfortunate Events)

Prufrock PrepImage via Lemony Snicket Wiki

 

Prufrock Prep isn’t exactly… welcoming.

Among Prufrock Prep’s many dazzling features are the Orphan Shack where all orphans are forced to live, a punishment where being late to class means you are forced to eat your meals like a dog with your hands tied behind your back, and your grade in gym class is worth 51% of your overall grade meaning most members of Bookstr‘s audience would probably flunk out.

Ha ha, gotcha. Nerds.

 

4. Crunchem Hall Primary School (Matilda)

Crunchem HallImage via Sony Pictures Entertainment

 

While Crunchem Hall didn’t last forever, it certainly left an impression on every child who read Matilda. I don’t even like to wear my hair in pigtails because I’m so irrationally afraid someone will grab me by the braid and fling me into the air.

They also just don’t look that good on me. I have a big forehead.

Also this school is literally shorthand ‘Crunch Them’ Hall. Who did that.

 

3. Hogwarts (Harry Potter Series)

HogwartsImage via Penguin Teen

 

I know everyone wants to be a wizard or witch, and everyone wants to hang with Harry and his crew, but Hogwarts is dangerous.

Even prior to Voldemort’s presence on campus there was a giant lizard monster in the basement, murderous mermaids in the water, and a backyard so deadly they had to name it the Forbidden Forest to keep students from going in and getting killed.

Some people might think I should’ve put Durmstrang on this list instead of Hogwarts, but honestly Hogwarts seems way more perilous.

Hogwarts became a literally battlefield at the apex of a wizarding world war, Durmstrang is just emo.

 

 

2. Shiroiwa Junior High (Battle Royale)

Shiroiwa Junior High class photoImage via What’s on TV

 

Realistically, you wouldn’t want to be an eighth grader at any school in this universe. You probably also don’t want to be a eighth grader in any universe, to be fair.

However being an eighth grader in Battle Royale means you could be randomly selected by the government to participate in a Hunger Games style fight to the death that lasts over the course of three days.

Now I didn’t love my middle school classmates, but I don’t want to murder them, and I definitely don’t want to be murdered by them.

 

1. The Rachel and Leah Re-Education Center (Handmaid’s Tale)

Image via Abbey Research

 

This school is where handmaids learn how to be handmaids. The women attending have their hands chopped off, their eyes gouged, and their tongues cut out as punishments for misbehaving.

Definitely makes detention seem like a walk in the park.

 

 

 

 

Featured image via American Cinematographers

7 Contemporary Adaptations of Classic Novels

Everyone likes an adaptation, and sometimes the best adaptations are underground. Here are seven picks from YouTube, perfect for marathoning, all based on classic novels and set in the modern era. No matter whether you’re a fan of Jane Austin, William Shakespeare, or Charlotte Bronte, there’s something for every classic book lover. Watch away!

 

1. Nothing Much To Do

 

Image via YouTube

 

If you like Much Ado About Nothing, get ready for Nothing Much to Do, an adaptation from New Zealand in vlog format, this time set at Messina High. All the accusations, the threats, and a few serenades on ukulele, this modern adaptation has all the humor and hatred you love, while also featuring a plastic flamingo. A must watch.

Based on Much Ado About Nothing, by William Shakespeare

 

 

2. Autobiography of Jane Eyre 

 

Image via Miss Daydreamer’s Place

 

Fans of Jane Eyre will appreciate the tragedy and measured pace of Autobiography of Jane Eyre. Filmed as a video diary, this series follows nursing student Jane as she leaves school, becomes a governess, and falls for the master of the house. Covering all the original beats of the story with inventiveness and heart, it has all the Gothic appeal of the original. Plus Adele is cute.

Based on Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

 

3. The Lizzie Bennet Diaries 

 

Image via The Hollywood Reporter

A classic, and for good reason. Thorough plotting, well paced character development, and silly costumes make this series compulsively watchable. Elizabeth is very much herself, lovable, judgmental, caringJane is sweet and decisive, Kitty is an actual cat, and Lydia is gleeful and wild. Set in California, Lizzie is a grad student with no interest in marriagemuch to her mother’s chagrin.

Based on Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austin

 

 

4. In Earnest

 

Image via Pinterest

Seriously, this web series is good. I’m not joking. You might say I’m Earnest, but honestly, who isn’t? Oscar Wilde’s classic is reimagined probably exactly as he would have wanted itwith everyone confused and overdressed. At just fifty episodes, it’s an excellent binge watch, and relatable, at least if you’ve ever wondered how to propose to someone you’ve given a false name.

Based on The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde

 

5. Emma Approved

 

Image via Hollywood.com

In this adaptation, Emma runs a PR firm with her brother-in-law, George Knightly. Some great parties, some terrible decisions, and outrageous confidence make this a fun and lighthearted series, despite any low moments. Fans of Austin will be thrilled, and if you’re not yet obsessed, you will be.

Based on Emma by Jane Austin

 

 

6. Anne With An E 

 

Image via Kickstarter

If you can’t wait to return to Green Gablesor visit for the first timeGreen Gables Fables is a delightful and heartwarming take on the classic story. Never discouraged, Anne’s passion and creativity make this series sing, and even at one-hundred-fifty episodes (the longest on this list), it seems too short.

Based on Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery

 

7. Jules and Monty

 

Image via YouTube

This adaptation of Shakespeare’s classic tragedy may have slightly less murder, but it has just as much tragedy as the original. The clash between two warring fraternities reaches new heights. Even with a lower mortality rate, this is still a tear jerker, so be warned. It’s also the shortest series on this list, with only twenty-one episodes.

Based on Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

 

 

Featured image via NegativeSpace

Antique Ring Containing Charlotte Brontë’s Hair Valued at $26,000

Celebrity hair collectors are in mourning today; leather jacket-clad professors, archeologists, and overzealous superfans bow their heads. Yet another treasure has been taken off the strand search list—none other than the long-sought-after braided lock of English novelist and poet, Charlotte Brontë. This news comes via an episode of Antiques Roadshow where a woman appeared on the show with a ring inscribed with the words “C. Brontë” on it (along with the date the writer died).

 

Image Via Jezebel.com

 

The show’s appraiser, Geoffrey Munn spoke with a woman who found the ring in her late father in law’s attic hidden inside a mysterious box. Clearly, the man was harboring something valuable—quest worthy. One can only imagine the adventure he experienced in search of hidden treasure. After rummaging through the attic and besting its Indiana Jones-esque booby traps, the unidentified woman found the key. Upon opening a hinge on the side of Brontë’s ring the referenced treasure was found.

 

Yess,” Munn whispers as she describes the hair, clearly awed. “Yes!”

 

 

 

Munn found no reason to question its credibility given the fact that hair collecting was an even more acceptable tradition back in the day (19th century).

“There was a sort of terror of not being able to remember the face and the character of people who had died, and so this is part of a tradition of making a true souvenir, an incorruptible fragment of the person that has died and to wear it. It wasn’t uncommon.”

The eldest of the Brontë sisters (all writers of the highest standard), Charlotte is best known for classic novels like Jane Eyre, Shirley, and Villette. Tragically, Charlotte never made it past the age of forty—she died in 1855. Although one never expects to have their hair or any other accessories to be sold centuries after they pass; the good fortune surrounding this discovery is a pleasant reminder that no one’s story is ever really over.

Geoffrey Munn put the ring at £20,000, or around $26,000. Hmm, I thought the going rate for Brontë hair was more…

 

 

 

Featured Image Via Ft.com