With September comes cold sweater weather. If you find yourself missing Summer already, blast the heat and bingewatch some Netflix and Hulu in your bikini!
For September we are including Hulu releases as well as Netflix. We have to be inclusive after all!
We’ve put every new release into categories and included the Netflix release dates to boot! Click on the titles or where it says “book” or “novel” to either the watch film/show trailer or to purchase the original book.
Have you ever been given a reading list that’s written, translated, and selected exclusively by and for men? Odds are you’ve rarely seen any that aren’t. If you want to appreciate the cannon while also living in a world where women exist, this is the list for you. These books and translations are some of the best and most lauded of all time, and yes, they’re by women.
It was, I must confess, a little hard to compile. The Odyssey was first translated by a woman only in 2017! But don’t despair. It’s all here for the taking.
The Iliad and the Odyssey
Homer’s epics have been translated MANY times, but these, by Caroline Alexander and Emily Wilson, respectively, set an incredible standard.
Close as can be to the ancient Greek, this translations has garnered heaping praise. “[T]he guard has changed, and a new gold standard has appeared”, said New Criterion at the volume’s publication. This edition even manages to retain the original line numbers from the Greek.
This work, too, matches the original Greek as closely as possible. “A staggeringly superior translation―true, poetic, lively and readable, and always closely engaged with the original Greek”, said Harvard classics professor Richard F. Thomas. Iambic pentameter imitates the lyricism of the original Greek, and the volume also includes translation guides and maps.
For both of these it is possible to turn to Anne Carson, a Canadian translator and classics professor. Carson’s translations are modern, elegant, and never condescending. In stead of translated, the works seem brought into the light, with all their strangeness and fierceness intact.
How is it that Jane Austen, often the only woman on a reading list, is still under hyped? I had a guy in a bar tell me once that if people like Austen it’s because they haven’t read a lot of books. He really said that. Family conflict, human stories, and scathing humor makes Austen worth reading, with characters you really will love, and hate.
It’s a staple for a reason, and if you’re not sure you’ll relate to these people’s problems, you’re wrong. Fuckboys, impending poverty, poor decisions, and character growth you can get behind. Plus, it may be a period piece, but people still love their sisters. You’ll relate.
Another classic people want to avoid, but it has everything: deaths, fire, lies, weddings, blindness. I wouldn’t exactly call Jane a relateable character, but she’s understandable, I think, when you see everything she’s been through. And she’s incredibly decisive.
There are so many spectacular Jane Austen quotes it’s hard to choose just three, but they’re not all just deep or wise or about marriage and life (or at least, not only those things). Some of them are actually the sickest burns I’ve ever seen in my life.
That is an incredibly metal way to talk about someone who died at sea. My god. Austen doesn’t get enough credit for totally demolishing people. These are not just cozy period pieces. Things get REAL. This is only like half the quote, too. She reads this guy straight through six feet and a coffin. He might not be good for much, but at least we got this devastating burn out of it.
What’s that Mr. Darcy? I don’t seem to understand you. Get rekt. Elizabeth is actually pretty polite. At least compared to Anne. I’m not sure there’s any outdoing her. Elizabeth is scathing though, and whatever she lacks in outright insults she certainly makes up for in getting her point across. There are many ways to offend.
Image via Duke University Libraries, quote via GoodReads
Be smug, readers. I guess this isn’t THAT bold of a statement, since people who DON’T enjoy novels aren’t likely to be reading Austen, but it’s also really extreme. “Intolerably stupid?” I mean, it’s not like I’m saying she’s completely wrong. I’m just saying. Those are READERS, Jane. Something something character development. If you didn’t like Northanger Abbey I guess this is why.
Sure, Emma’s not a perfect character, but she is trying to help, even if she… really shouldn’t. It’s not like anyone lets her get away with her nonsense, anyway. Insert growth meme. But between meddling, genuinely helping, and finally figuring out her own life, here are some really memeable moments we can’t let go by unnoticed.
When you love unsolicited advice
Image via Goodreads
I mean, she wasn’t, but relatable, amirite? We’ve all known someone who basically runs their relationship like madlibs. Poor Harriet, though. She thinks Emma is so cool and wise, just because she acts cool and wise. Maybe by the end, but certainly not here.
When your friend always knows what’s best
Image via Tumblr
Stay out of it, Emma. The guy you picked isn’t exactly a gentleman, at least not in action. I’m all for helping your friend find the best guy for her, but maybe the first criterion should be at least the slightest bit of interest. I’m just saying.
Feeling the funeral spirit?
Image via Tumblr
Okay, so maybe not the most appropriate tone to strike at a funeral, but it’s understandable. Sure, someone died, but what about true love? I ask you. Everything’s coming up Fairfax. And Churchill. And honestly even Woodhouse. Frank’s aunt really did the story a solid.
A good nemesis is hard to find
Image via Tumblr
Have you ever had a nemesis? Because let me tell you, it is great. Sure, she looks angry, and maybe she is, but you can definitely enjoy a good rivalry. The most important part of having a mortal enemy is to have fun and be yourself.
When he gives super helpful advice
Image via Emma
What a quality take, KNIGHTLEY. Just what everybody wants, your opinion on women. Okay, so he probably didn’t mean any harm. Still pretty insulting though. I guess we’ll forgive him, since he’s less of a jerk by the end. Insert growth meme again. This books sure has character development.