The live-action version, which starred a lot of famous celebrities such as Jennifer Hudson, Taylor Swift, Judy Dench, and James Corden, was a major disappointment.
Some of you may have seen the new CATS movie adaptation. For those that have, and to T.S. Eliot who must be rolling in his grave, I offer my deepest condolences. At least the entire experience has offered us an everlasting vault of comedic material. The newest treasure in our little trove comes from Twitter user Jack Waz:
I’m not sure this man knew what he was getting into, but this triggered something deep inside the Internet and thanks to him the hashtag #ReleaseTheButtholeCut is now trending. Here are a couple of the best:
Aren’t you so glad there’s a bit of light in these trying times? For god’s sake, give the people what they need and release the buttholes!
Featured image via digital spy
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A list of poems about cats to get you ready for the book-of-poems-turned-musical-turned-nightmarish-film called Cats? Oh yes.
For those not in the loop, the musical Cats was originally inspired by a short book of cat poems written by T.S. Eliot. Did actors and actresses walk around the stage wearing cat costumes? Yes. Has the musical become both a theatrical classic and a joke? You bet.
And now, with the film premiering in the United States in but a few days, should we be ready for an uncanny valley nightmare? Yes.
Am I still going to go watch it?
…Yeah. Yeah, I am.
And am I going to use this film’s premiere as an excuse to share five poems about cats?
Here are five poems about cats for your reading consumption.
1. “The Cat and The Moon” by W.B. Yeats
image via teepublic
The cat went here and there
And the moon spun round like a top,
And the nearest kin of the moon,
The creeping cat, looked up.
Black Minnaloushe stared at the moon,
For, wander and wail as he would,
The pure cold light in the sky
Troubled his animal blood.
Minnaloushe runs in the grass
Lifting his delicate feet.
Do you dance, Minnaloushe, do you dance?
When two close kindred meet,
What better than call a dance?
Maybe the moon may learn,
Tired of that courtly fashion,
A new dance turn. [read more]
2. “February” by Margaret Atwood
image via animalwised
3. “Les chats” or “cats” by Charles Baudelaire (translation by william aggeler)
image via bookriot
Both ardent lovers and austere scholars
Love in their mature years
The strong and gentle cats, pride of the house,
Who like them are sedentary and sensitive to cold.
Friends of learning and sensual pleasure,
They seek the silence and the horror of darkness;
Erebus would have used them as his gloomy steeds:
If their pride could let them stoop to bondage. [read more]
4. “The cats will know” by cesare Pavese (translation by geoffrey brock)
image via pinterest
5. “The Naming of Cats” by t.s. Eliot
image via Brain pickings
It isn’t just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there’s the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo, or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—
But all of them sensible everyday names,
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that’s particular,
A name that’s peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum—
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there’s still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover—
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Deep and inscrutable singular name.
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During the summer, the first trailer for the feature length adaptation of the musical Cats was released, and the internet was set on fire due to the terrifying looks of the actors as they were transformed into CGI-humanoid cats. I mean, just look at these guys:
Image Via Heart Radio
The negative reception to the special effects hasn’t stopped the film from releasing this Christmas, and today, Universal Pictures released a new trailer for the film. This trailer comes packed with more singing, dancing, and cat jokes:
Based on Andrew Lloyd Weber’s musical, which is based on T.S. Eloit’s book of poems titled Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats, Cats follows a cat named Victoria as she interacts with the tribe of “Jellicle” cats who are competing to see who will be chosen to ascend into the “Heaviside Layer” and come back to a new life.
Newcomer Francesca Hayward plays Victoria, joining an all-star cast featuring James Corden, Judi Dench, Jason Derulo, Idris Elba, Jennifer Hudson, Ian McKellen, Taylor Swift, and Rebel Wilson. Just look at Taylor Swift in all her furry glory:
as soon as I saw @catsmovie gave the lady cats breasts, I should have assumed someone would shake them while dancing but I still wasn’t prepared for the reality of what that would look like… pic.twitter.com/tT24lyBcAG
— Jarett Wieselman (@JarettSays) November 19, 2019
Cats will hit theaters on December 20th.
Featured Image Via Saturday Evening Post
Its been a stellar year for book adaptations, but there’s still plenty of them on the way to close out 2019! From TV to film, lots of book adaptations are coming to your screens this winter and there’s a huge helping to binge into. Let’s dive into this list and see what are some of the best and coolest looking page to screen adaptations coming this fall!
1-‘The good liar’
image via vulture
The Good Lair by Nicholas Searle is about a smarmy con man who decides to his latest con will be a wealthy widow he meets online, determined to swindle her of her veritable fortune. But maybe he actually starts falling for her and finds himself more attached to the widow than he realizes. For her part, the widow is more than she seems. The movie adaptation comes November 15th, starring Ian McKellen and Helen Mirren and is sure to be an intriguing adaptation of the novel for nothing else but its stellar cast.
image via Vulture
Did you know Cats was a based on a book? Yep! Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats is where Andrew Lloyd Webber drew inspiration from for his famous musical and where the movie will draw some inspiration from too (probably). Although this movie looks very odd and strange from the teasers (Taylor Swift as a cat person…nightmare fuel), you know you’re going to be lining up to see it nonetheless. After all, what will it look like on the big screen?
image via Amazon
Most of you probably know Little Women but its a classic of American literature. Focusing on the March sisters as they come into womanhood and find their way in the world, this new adaptation promises to be the closest to the material yet. It stars Emma Watson, Timothée Chalamet, Saoirse Ronan, and Laura Dern. To get your fix of more content of this novel, check this out come December 25th!
Image via Amazon
Doctor Sleep was the sequel to one of Stephen King’s most exciting novels, The Shining. Focusing on Dan Torrance, the boy protagonist of the original novel, now a middle aged man and a 12 year old girl who shares his psychic powers gift. Together, they must fight off a tribe of murderous paranormals who want the young girl for what she represents. The film promises to be just as exciting, starring Ewan MacGregor and revisiting a lot of nostalgia for the movie adaptation by Stanley Kubrick. Plus, it looks scary as hell. We can’t wait for this one to launch.
Featured Image Via Vulture