Tag: American Psycho

11 of Literature’s Worst Monsters

You read the title, now let’s get going!

But first, let’s set up one rule: all of the monsters on this list have to be fictional. No non-fiction real people. No, “I read a book on Manson and he was evil so why is he not on this list?” No. All these people are fiction, figments of an author’s imagination.

With that said, let’s start off with:

 

 

11-Carmelita Spats

Carmelita Spats (TAA)

Image Via Lemony Snicket Wiki – Fandom

 

I have nothing against children (that’s a lie), but she’s just plain EVIL! From the first pages of A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Austere Academy, you know this girl is trouble, and she is. Duncan and Isadora, two orphans already at the academy, are forced to live in a shack due to not having parents or guardians to sign the permission slip for the dorms. Carmelita begins referring to their shack as the Orphans Shack.

And that’s before our trio, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny, make their way into the story.

When she and Violet have the same class, Carmelita takes it upon herself to poke Violet with a stick and whisper “orphan” every few minutes. Plus, she takes it upon herself to remind the orphans that, well, they’re orphans. Even worst, she calls them “cakesniffers!”, a confusing but still ultimately insulting jab at their…lack of cake?

 

Cakesniffer!
Image Via Pinterest

 

Come The Slippery Slope, Carmelita  meets Olaf and Esmé Squalor face to face. Without a second thought, she abandons her parents and becomes their child.

Think about it. Her parents sent her to Prufrock Preporatory, a boarding school. I know rich people send most of their kids away for boarding school, but this just stinks that her parents don’t even like Carmelita, and honestly, who could blame them?

When Olaf and Esmé have our trio in their grasp they discuss which Baudelaire to leave alive for the fortune, and Carmelita suggests keeping Violet so they can tie her hair to things.

In the Grim Grotto, Olaf shows his human side with his annoyance at this little monster. Who can blame him? Every moment she’s on the page she just shows off how bratty she is.

 

You’re a cakesniffer and she eats cake! / Image Via Lemony Snicket Wiki – Fandom

 

Come The Penultimate Peril we’re on Olaf’s side when he abandons her and Esmé, since Esmé refuses to discipline the girl and Carmelita needs to be taken out back and shot Old Yeller-style.

What does Carmelita do next? She submits a book about how wonder she is to be used as evidence in a potential trial against Count Olaf and the Baudelaires.

Disloyal, wicked, and evil, Carmelita is a true monster. Don’t beleive me yet? Here’s the song she sings over and over again in The Grim Grotto:

C is for ‘cute’

A is for ‘adorable’!

R is for ‘ravishing’!

M is for ‘gorgeous’!

E is for ‘excellent’!

L is for ‘lovable’!

I is for ‘I’m the best’!

T is for ‘talented’!

and A is for ‘a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian’!

Now let’s sing my whole wonderful song all over again!

 

10-The White Witch

The White Witch
Image Via Wikipedia

 

The main antagonist of The Magician’s Nephew and of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, Jadis is cold hearted demon. Not only did she murder God (Aslan), she enslaved Narnia to a thousand year winter. That wouldn’t be so bad, trees do annoy me, but she made it so it’s never Christmas but always winter.

Meanie!

To make it worse, she persuaded Edmund to turn against his friends with Turkish delight.

I have the right mind to call Jadis Judas.

 

9-Tywin

Tywin Lannister

IMage Via A Wiki of Ice and Fire – Westeros.org

 

This is hard, considering a lot of the characters in A Song of Ice and Fire are terrible people, but I say Tywin takes the cake. Yes, Joffrey is a psychopath, but Tywin is worse. Here’s why:

He emotionally abuses Tyrion

He uses Cersei as a brood mare

He sends The Mountain off and “didn’t know” that the Mountain would rape/kill Elia Martell and bash her two baby children against the wall.

Worst of all, Tywin is a perfectly rational person. This isn’t an issue of “bad genes” or anything like that. He was disrespected as a child, and thus he intends to never be disrespected again. Now that he’s an adult with the power he always dreamed of, he hasn’t stopped. He’s not bloodthirsty, he’s apathetic. Family is everything, and he won’t stop until he holds all the power over Westeros, no matter what the cost.

 

8-Dracula

Christopher Lee as Dracula
Image Via Birth.Movies.Death

 

I know he’s a vampire and that might be a good excuse for biting people, but going strictly off the Bram Stoker’s Dracula, The Count is kind of a monster. Yes, he has to suck blood, but I’m not going to hold that against him. At his core he’s a predator. There’s no right or wrong that comes into play here because when you need to eat, you need to eat.

So he is even on this list? Well, let’s look at what he does…

He imprisoned Jonathan Harker.

He impersonated Harker so he could commit heinous crimes in his name, despite the fact he can transform and quickly get away, not impersonation required

He slaughtered an entire ship full of men.

He preyed on Mina just to hurt Jonathan and her family

Dracula doesn’t just feed because he needs to feed, he revels in his predator status just to terrify his prey because he finds it amusing. He’s like a shark that tells you, “I’m going to eat you whole and you’re going to want to scream but you’ll be suffocating as you slide down my throat”.

Dracula takes it a one step, and a couple more, from what his nature requires.

 

 

7-Morgoth

Morgoth
IMAGE Via ArtStation

 

Morgoth, Melkor, he’s known by several different names, but either way he’s a monster. We learn that in The Silmarillion that, after falling from glory, Morgoth corrupted all those in his wake. You think Sauron is bad? Sauron works for this monster.

It was only when Morgoth, after declaring war against the Elves and Men and slaughtering much of them during the First Age, that he was bound in chains and thrown into the void, leaving Sauron to trouble the world, as we see in The Hobbit and the Lords of the Ring trilogy.

 

Morgoth
Image Via Men of the West, Youtube

 

Worst of all, according to a prophecy, Morgoth will rise again.

Morgoth, Melkor, whatever you want to call him, he’s the OG monster in Tolkien’s leafy universe.

 

6-Patrick Bateman

Patrick Bateman

Image Via McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

 

In a world where everyone doesn’t listen to each other and people are routinely mistaken for others, Patrick Bateman fades into the background, and he loves that fact. But, subconsciously or otherwise, he leads a double life as a murderer.

Wealthy, materialistic, this Wall Street investment banker does less time working and more time going to parties. Plus, he tortures women and poor people and gays and children. Or maybe he doesn’t, it’s left very vague whether all his killings are actually happening.

As he loses his grip on reality, there’s one pivotal scene in the novel, but not in the Christian Bale film adaptation, where Patrick Bateman gives his girlfriend a cake. Aww!

 

 

She eats it, calling it minty. Twist! Since he doesn’t like his girlfriend very much, he given her a chocolate covered urinal cake.

 

Image result for urinal cake
Image Via Metro

 

Real or imaginary, that’s…uh…ewwwww

 

5-Annie Wilkes

Annie Wilkes

Image Via Bungalower

 

Annie Wilkes is the scariest character Stephen King ever created. Obsessive, psychotic, and worst of all…human.

She only appeared in Misery, and she certainly made an impression. The embodiment of every obsessive fan out there, Annie finds popular writer Paul Sheldon after a car crash. So she kidnaps him, ties him to a bed, and refuses to let him go until he writes a book. Paul is forced to indulge her every whim lest there be tragedy consequences.

When he tires to escape, he chops off his foot with an ax and cauterizing his ankle with a blowtorch. When his typewriter breaks down, she cuts off his thumb with an electric knife. When a state trooper comes to her house, she runs him over with her riding law mower.

 

 

4-Christian Grey

Christian Grey

Image Via Inverse

 

The titular character of Fifty Shades of Grey, Christian is abusive, emotionally unstable, and an all around prick who the author doesn’t think is problematic any way.

For one, he claims he’s in BDSM but in reality he just likes hurting women who have brown hair. Like his mom “the crack whore”. When Ana tells him she’s a virgin, he stomps around the room before deciding that he has to ‘take care of it’.

Yes, he was abused by an older woman, but he refuses to say she did anything wrong. Not only does he refuse to say she did anything wrong, but you better not tell him he’s wrong or else…

He also gives Ana whine while she’s signing a contract.

 

3-Victor Frankenstein

Victor Frankenstein

Image Via Wikipedia

 

Not the monster, the doctor who created him. This scientist is the true monster of the story.

After creating life itself, Victor looks upon his creation and sees something that is clearly not human. He sees something breathing, thinking, alive, but less than perfect, and so he rejects it, shuns it from the world.

 

The creation, Adam, confronts Victor Frankenstein

Image Via Owlcation

 

The creature seeks revenge against him, but are we to blame the creature? Forced away from the one who gave it life into an unforgiving world, the creature could not thrive, only survive. His vengeance is not just wrath, it’s justice for the mistakes Victor has created.

While he regrets creating the creature, Victor does not look upon the creature with understanding. Instead he calls the creature ‘fiend’ or ‘demon’ and pursues him to the Arctic, intend to kill it. He falls through the ice and dies, warning other not to meddle with life, but failing to teach them the lesson of empathy.

 

Victor Frankenstein

Image Via Twitter

 

Cold blooded, Victor Frankenstein is the monster, the only monster, in Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus.

 

2-Humbert Humbert

Humbert Humbert
Image Via Rhiannon Hart

 

Humbert Humbert uses language to seduce the readers, and he almost succeeds. But lest we forget: he’s a pedophile, obsessed over a girl he calls Lolita. That’s why the book is called Lolita.

For the record, her real name is Dolores.

Back to Humbert. He marries a woman to get closer to his daughter and, once the woman dies, he kidnaps her.

The worst of it is that Humbert Humber makes himself a sympathetic pedophile. He criticizes the vulgarity of American culture, establishing himself as an intellectual, and considers his sexuality to be a sign of his culture.

A monster, if I ever saw one, but nothing compared to our number one pick…

 

 

1-The Judge

Image Via AMazon

 

“The Judge” appears Blood Meridian very early on. We’re following the kid who goes to a revival meeting when a man bursts into the tent and tells the crowd that the preacher up on stage isn’t a real preacher, but a man wanted in three states.

The man who burst into the tent is “The Judge” and you might not know it, but he’s one you have to watch out for.

But compared to the illiterate drunken rapists surrounded you, the Judge is a breath of fresh air. Just look at that first scene! He showed everyone who that ‘preacher’ truly was. He has morals.

If you think about it, that means you’ve put your trust into this monster.

 

The Judge
Image Via PInterest

 

You see, when the Judge burst into that tent he saw the kid. He didn’t just look at him, he saw into his soul. That’s good. Cormac McCarthy never says who the Judge exactly is, if he has gone mad, but if they told me he wasn’t human, if they told me he was the personification of evil, I’d believe it.

 

The Judge

Image Via Texas Hill Country

 

 

 

Featured Image Via Youtube Channel Men of the West, Texas Hill Country, and Wikipedia

8 Books About Descending into Madness Before ‘The Joker’ Comes Out

Before Todd Phillips sends in the clown and unveils The Joker on a silver screen this October 4th, let’s look through some of the some of the best books about absolutely losing your mind.

This movie is a tough cookie for us. Yes, it’s based partially on The Killing Joke, but what it’s taken from Alan Moore’s iconic graphic novel appears to just be a few bits and pieces (although I’m making a bet right now that the scene when the Joker goes on stage is the beginning to that horrific scene from The Dark Knight Returns), but besides that, the influences on Todd Phillips’ newest ‘comedy’ is mostly from old Scorcese films such as Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, Mean Streets, and King of Comedy.

So how do we talk about this film? Well, we’re going to do exactly what the title of this article says and go through the top eight greatest books about descending into madness. You know the meme.

 

Joker Meme

Image Via ME.ME

 

Well, turns out that society has always been pretty terrible, a hotbed for madness. But how mad is that madness? Let’s find out. Viewer discretion is advised.

 

 

8-Life of Pi by Yann Martel

 

I believe that whatever doesn’t kill you, simply makes you… stranger. – The Dark Knight

 

Life of Pi by [Martel, Yann]

Image Via Amazon

 

I know what you’re thinking: this is a book about a boy living on a boat with a tiger after a shipwreck, but is it?

Let’s start at the beginning: Pi was bullied by his peer relentlessly before writing out the square root of pi (well, as much as he could) in order to change his nickname from ‘Pissing Patel’ to ‘Pi.’ Thus, he faced society’s onslaught, and that’s only in the prologue.

Do things get better from there? Well, he was certainly one of the few survivors from a shipwreck but after that things get fuzzy.

He tells a writer he’s interviewing with that he survived on the lifeboat with a tiger, a spotted hyena, and a zebra with a broken leg. The hyena kills the zebra and the tiger kills the zebra, and Pi manages to befriend the tiger before returning to land. Pi is saved and the tiger escapes, wandering into the wilderness never to be found again.

But the official story is far worse. The survivors on the boat weren’t a zebra, a hyena, and a tiger, but rather Pi’s mother, a brutish cook, and Pi himself. The cook killed his mother and then Pi killed the cook, feasting on human remains and using other pieces as fish bait.

Which is the true story? Did Pi do the impossible and live on the water with a tiger, or did he go crazy and imagine a tiger to make himself feel better?

Maybe Pi did descend into madness and cannibalism, or maybe the tiger story is true, but either way he now lives in a world filled with those that doubt him.

 

7-Yellow wallpaper by Charlotte Gilman

 

They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out—like a leper. See, their “morals”, their “code”… it’s a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. – The Dark Knight

 

Image Via Amazon

 

An important early work of American feminist literature, due to its illustration of the attitudes towards mental and physical health of women in the 19th century.

Narrated in the first person, the story is a collection of journal entries written by a woman going through postpartum depression whose physician husband (John) decides to treat her by not treating her. He forces her to live inside a boarded up room where she is told to simply eat well and get plenty of air.

The only stimulus in this room, the only thing she can be interested in, is the room’s yellow wallpaper.

From there, her mind slowly unravels. She starts believing there are things behind or inside the wallpaper and, as she grows into madness, she starts chasing the wallpaper and creeping like a spider beside the wallpaper. Her life becomes this wallpaper.

This treatment was common during the early 19th century and, since the book was published in 1892, it shows a woman’s steady descent into madness thanks to society’s indifferent ignorance.

 

6-Catcher in the Rye by Holden Caulfield

 

The Catcher in the Rye by [Salinger, J.D.]

Image Via Amazon

 

The mob has plans. The cops have plans. Gordon’s got plans. Y’know they’re schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. – The Dark Knight

 

In case you haven’t read this book, Holden Caulfield is an outsider living on the brink of society. Everyone thinks he’s crazy, a drifter, but he rightly criticizes and critiques adults for their superficiality. ‘Phony’ is what Caulfield calls them, as he dreams to be a child again when times were simpler.

After spending a novel-length amount of time floating through the town, going largely unnoticed except when he’s mugged by a pimp, he ends up in an asylum. Yes, he pledges to get his life on track, but can we really believe him?

 

 

5-High-Rise by J B Ballard

 

When the chips are down, these…these civilized people, they’ll eat each other. – The Dark Knight

 

High-Rise: A Novel by [Ballard, J. G.]

Image Via Amazon

 

Following his divorce and the death of his sister, Dr. Robert Laing moves into the twenty-fifth floor of an apartment complex. From there, he’s continually bombarded with negative events, including a costume party he’s invited to where everyone mocks and degrades him. Eventually, he goes over the edge, not to spoil the plot, but it ends with cannibalism as the once-peaceful residents of the apartment complex descend into madness.

The similarities to the film should be obvious. Laing and Arthur Fleck are both beaten down by society and eventually crack, proving that the worst monsters don’t have sharp teeth and bear-like claws, but a human face and simple words and judgmental glares.

 

4-Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky

 

This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. – The Dark Knight

 

Crime and Punishment by [Dostoyevsky, Fyodor]

Image Via Amazon

 

Rodion Raskolnikov is a law student who dreams of enforcing the law, but those morals go out the window because of poverty. Society has cast him out, and poverty forces this ex-student to kill an unscrupulous pawnbroker for her money.

After the murder, Raskolnikov is morally racked by his deed, tormented with confusion, paranoia, and disgust, forcing him deeper into poverty.

Poverty pushes him to kill, and once he’s killed his misery drives him deeper into poverty. This vicious cycle is one society forces on him, and with each passing moment he falls deeper and deeper into madness.

 

3-Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe

 

Why so serious? – The Dark Knight

 

Image result for tell tale heart amazon

Image Via Amazon

 

For some reason, there is a man who lives with an older man who has a ‘vulture’ eye. Why does he have a vulture eye? Does the vulture eye represent something? Is the man his father, his landlord, his master? Is the narrator a servant?

The exact circumstances are left unclear, but the narrator’s decent into madness isn’t.

After a carefully calculated murder, a ‘perfect crime,’ the narrator dismembers and disposes the body under the floorboards. Then the police came and they talk to the man about this unidentified old man. During the conversation, the narrator hears a a beating heart and grows concerned, then realizes that the police are openly mocking him, ignoring the heartbeat and watching him suffer.

The twist? It’s subtle, you might miss it, but the heartbeat the narrator hears isn’t the old man’s, but his own. Talk about madness.

 

2-Rats in the Walls by Lovecraft

 

It’s a funny world we live in. – The Dark Knight

 

Image result for The Rats in the Walls amazon

Image Via Amazon

 

After Delapore, an American, moves into an English estate, he and his cat start hearing the sounds of rats scurrying behind the walls. Finding himself in a society that doesn’t accept him because he’s a ‘foreigner,’ Delapore tries to find the truth about the rats behind the wall, but his psyche starts to unravel.

After a series of dreams, Delapore learns that his family maintained an underground city for centuries, where they raised generations of ‘human cattle’—some regressed to a quadrupedal state—to supply their taste for human flesh. Is this true, or is he simply mad?

Well, after, Delapore attacks and cannibalizes one of his few friends, he is locked in a mental asylum. This ends his reign of madness but he continues losing his mind, proclaiming that it was “the rats, the rats in the walls,” that ate the man.

The society that rejected him continues to do so given that the investigators of the case tear down the estate, covering it up and excluding one of their own officers after he goes insane as well. It truly is a funny world.

 

 

1-American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis

 

American Psycho

Image Via EdwardSexton.com

 

Does it depress you, commissioner? To know just how alone you really are? – The Dark Knight

 

A stockbroker in midtown Manhattan, Patrick Bateman lives in a world where people don’t talk to each other, don’t listen to each other, and don’t really know each other. People know him, but they don’t know the “real” him. He exists as a part of the crowd. He’s not rejected by society because that means they’d have to notice him.

This world of superficiality gets to him, and he turns full killer, or does he?

It’s the main question of the novel that no one, not even the author, can answer. At the end of the novel, he goes to the apartment where he’s killed numerous people to find it perfectly clean. Is this because he’s been hallucinating all these murders, or was the apartment cleaned because the owners doesn’t want a negative reputation to affect its resale value?

He killed a man, but then he’s told the man is on vacation. What’s happening here?

The answer is we don’t know because we don’t know the real Patrick Bateman, and we don’t know the real Bateman because he doesn’t know himself. It’s not a look into insanity, it’s us drowning in a world brought to us by a man who is utterly alone.

In this novel, we live and breath madness, and that’s about as close as the Joker’s world as we’re going to get…

 

…until the film comes out. Will you see it opening day, or will you be too busy cleaning up a murder scene that might not even exist?

 

 

Featured Image Via USA Today

7 Actors Who Were Nearly In Your Favorite Adaptations!

A lot of your favorite adaptations of books and comics could have a lot differently if different people were cast or, even crazier yet, involved.

Maybe these adaptations would have been better, maybe they would have been worse, maybe they would have been so different that you’d be watching a totally different movie!

I’ll leave the opinion on how the film would have turned out to you, but there are seven popular adaptations that would have gone a lot differently, to say the least, if we had these people starred in the film instead.

7. Batman Returns

 

Batman dancing
Image Via SBS

A now infamous event cemented in movie history, Sean Young wanted to play Catwoman, and I mean she REALLY wanted to be Catwoman. Tim Burton’s Batman was an international sensation that brought the caped crusaders back into public consciousness, permanently making him an icon who was, well, not the Adam West version. Tim Burton’s Batman legacy wouldn’t even exist without the weirdness of Batman Forever or the campiness of Batman and Robin!

Granted, many (myself included) blame the camp of the Joel Schumacher follow-ups on the fact that Batman Returns was so bloody dark, which led the studio to freak out and making Val Kilmer say the line, “I’ll take drive through.” Before Batman Returns, hit theaters, it had quite an interesting production process. Batman Returns. It starts with Tim Burton’s Batman, believe it or not.

 

Sean Young
Image Via Gazette Review

Sean Young was cast as Vicki Vale, but was forced to drop out after breaking her arm during rehearsals for 1989 film. As a result, she really wanted to be in Batman Returns, and I mean she REALLY wanted to be a part of the movie. So much so that she visited the production offices dressed in a homemade Catwoman costume, demanding an audition. Reportedly, Tim Burton wasn’t on set.

Michelle Pfeiffer ended up getting the role.

Sorry Sean Young. At least she’s a good sport about it. Recently she’s quoted as saying:

If these Warner Bros. executives now were really good businessmen, they’d let me play Catwoman today, and I’d make a smash amount of money

If you want a look at Sean Young as Catwoman, she also appeared on the Joan Rivers Show in costume.

 

 

6. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie poster
Image Via Amazon

Johnny Depp has been accused of basing his performance as Willy Wonka in Tim Burton’s remake of the Roald Dahl story, on Michael Jackson. In response, Depp said the similarities to Jackson never occurred to him, but instead compared Wonka to Howard Hughes due to his “reclusive, germaphobe, controlling” nature. Regardless, it’s fitting that Michael Jackson almost played the eccentric character.

In Randall Sullivan’s Untouchable: The Strange Life and Tragic Death of Michael Jackson, the author recounts how Jackson “recorded an original soundtrack for the film at a small studio in Los Angeles” and showed Warner Brothers the soundtrack.

They loved it, agreed to pay anything for it, but he said he would give it to them for free as long as he was cast as Willy Wonka.

The book quotes Marc Schaffel, Jackson’s executive producer:

I think Tim Burton wanted Johnny Depp all along, but the reason Warner Brothers gave, when I pressed them, was ‘We can’t have this guy starring in what would be a children’s movie. As a marketable idea, it doesn’t work’

Jackson refused to give them the soundtrack unless he was Willy Wonka. Not a background character, not a supporting character, not one of those Oompa Loompas…

 

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory's Oompa Loompas
Image Via Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Wiki – Fandom

…just Willy Wonka.

Warner Brothers refused, and Jackson shelved the soundtrack. This is unfortunate, especially since Marc latter notes that he’s sure that the soundtrack “would have won [Jackson] an Academy Award”

5. American Psycho

American Psycho

Image Via Amazon

The movie based on Bret Easton Ellis’ controversial book spent years in development in hell, after once Mary Harron was brought on board everything seemed like it was fine. Mary Harron would be the director and word around the street was Christian Bale would star as Patrick Bateman.

 

Leonardo DiCaprio

Image Via IMDB

Behind closed doors, however, Lionsgate was interested in pursuing Leonardo DiCaprio for the lead role, arguing Bale was not famous enough.

 

 

However, Harron was refusing to meet with DiCaprio and told the studio she thought DiCaprio was too boyish and wouldn’t fit because the actor had become a full blown teen idol following Titanic and Romeo + Juliet.

 

Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman
Image Via Amazon

Going forward with DiCaprio, the actor drafted a shortlist of replacement directors, including Oliver Stone, Danny Boyle, and Martin Scorsese. Stone was brought aboard, but could not agree on the film’s direction. Luckily, Harron and Bale came back under the agreement that the budget would not exceed $10 million and DiCaprio departed at the behest of his agent to, you know, not play a probable serial killer.

4. X-Men

X Men movie poster
Image Via IMDB

Let’s cleanse our palates by going back to the first X-Men. Comic book adaptations weren’t taken seriously at the time, but with the smash hit of Blade, a rated R comic book movie staring a black man, Fox was aching just to make bank on a Marvel property they had newly acquired.

They had to get the casting just right, but Michael Jackson once again danced his way and wanted a part in this movie too. As who? you might be wondering?

 

 

Well, unless you already know you’re not going to guess it. Let’s just hear what screenwriter David Hayter – a key component of Fox’s early X-Men movie franchise –has to say:

Michael Jackson came in because he wanted to play Professor X. It was amazing.

 

Would it? I have no idea how that would have played out.

All in all, Professor X owns a school of mutants and Michael Jackson wanted to play him.

 

3. Twilight

Twilight
Image Via Amazon

While not as dramatic as the other two, Jennifer Lawrence auditioned for a role in Twilight. As a young actress, she was going around Hollywood trying to get roles. Of her experiences auditioning before she made it big, she says “You just get like five pages [at the audition] and they’re like, ‘Act monkey.’”

 

Jennifer Lawrence
Image Via Boston Magazine

Lawrence also admitted that she hadn’t the slightest idea that Twilight would turn into such a big deal, adding back in December 2012 in an interview with The Guardian that:

I remember when the movie first came out, seeing Kristen Stewart on the red carpet and getting papped wherever she went…I had no idea Twilight would be such a big deal. For me, and I’m assuming for her, it was just another audition. Then it turned into this whole other thing.

If Jennifer Lawrence was cast, does that mean that Kristen Stewart could have been Katniss Everdeen in The Hunger Games?

 

2. Spider-Man

Spider-Man movie poster

Image Via Amazon

? Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a Spider can

Spins a web, and he’s lots of fun

Hold up, he was almost Michael Jackson?

Yep, before Tobey was cast, Michael Jackson wanted to be the man whose playing a high school student behind the mask.

 

 

Stan Lee himself revealed that Jackson had met with him “a number of times“.

In fact, he (Jackson) came to my house once with his son, and I remember my wife took care of his son for about an hour while Michael and I were talking.

Here’s a clip below.

 

 

Jackson wanted to be Spider-Man, but upon learning that Stan Lee, the creator of Spider-Man along with Steve Ditko, didn’t own the rights to the character, he wanted to buy Marvel. Obviously that deal never went through, but there’s a universe out there where Jackson doesn’t own the rights to the Beetles songs but instead owns Marvel.

 

1. Lord of the Rings

Lord of the Rings

Image Via LOTR Wiki – Fandom

Lord of the Rings has been adaptation twice with Ralph Bakshi’s 1978 cartoon adaptation of The Lord of the Rings and Peter Jackson’s award-winning trilogy, but we also got another adaptation. Do you know by who?

Well, speaking of the Beatles…

 

The Beatles

Image Via Grammy

In 1963, the Beatles accepted a three-movie deal offered by the United Artists production company, however only made two movies: the mockumentary A Hard Day’s Night and the adventurous James Bond parody Help!

Their third film was never made, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t have some wacky ideas, and when I say ‘ideas’ I mean one idea.

They wanted to make an adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings trilogy, based on Tolkien’s work, which they would honor “by creating an epic psychedelic adaptation that would feature their original songs“.

 

Stanley Kubrick

Image Via Zocalo Public Square

The Beetles dream of having the director SpartacusLolita, and Dr. Strangelove Stanley Kubrick. He said ‘no’, believing it was too complex for the silver screen, and opted to focus on 2001: A Space Odyssey.Meanwhile, the Beetles didn’t even have the rights to make the movie. They were confident, however, when they spoke to J.R.R. Tolkien.

 

J R R Tolkien

Image Via Variety

He declined, and the project was dead in the water.

 

Now I know I said before that “I’ll leave the opinion on how the film would have turned out to you,” but I don’t care. This would have been awesome.

 

 

Featured Image Via Time Magazine

Bret Easton Ellis, author of 'Less Than Zero'

Bret Easton Ellis: Millennials “Don’t Care About Literature”

“What is Millennial culture?” probed American Psycho author Bret Easton Ellis in an interview with the Sunday Times.

There are innumerable answers: destroyers of deadbeat chains like Buffalo Wild Wings and Aeropostle, winners of participation trophies, helpless crybabies who can’t fit houses into their avocado budgets. Fed up is as good an answer as any. It’s admittedly difficult to define any generation in a single sentence, particularly if that sentence is a condescending remark from a man who is “not really bothered” by politics—a facet of society some might consider to be the essence of culture (come on, didn’t all our favorite throwback punk music drop in the Bush years?). Ellis went on to clarify his statements.

“There’s no writing,” Ellis insisted, hot off the publication of his first release in nearly ten years. “None of them reads books.”

 

Research reveals Millennials are the most likely to use the public library.

Image Via Pew Research

 

Statistically, he’s incorrect: Millennials (widely defined as those born between 1981 and 1996) read five books per year on average, one higher than the national average. They’re also more likely than any other generation to visit the public library and have a documented preference for print media, which has helped to keep indie bookstores alive in a more digital era. According to Forbes, Millennials “read more than older generations do—and more than the last generation did at the same age.” But he’s right about one thing: he’s certainly provocative.

“My ability to trigger Millennials is insane,” he boasted to The Guardianwhich we imagine was not one of the blurbs on the jacket of his latest book—White, a non-fiction collection as confrontational as its title. In an interview that The Washington Post described as a “multivehicle pileup of a Q & A,” he described his collection as provocative rail against political correctness. When asked to describe his political stance, he said, “I think politics are ridiculous,” to which the interviewer replied: “maybe don’t write a book about it.”

 

'White' by Bret Easton Ellis
IMAGE VIA THE EVENING STANDARD

 

Nothing so vulgar as knowledge can stop Ellis from promoting his novel. He states his political opinions proudly and unabashedly. “Trump does not bother me more than what has been going on with the ‘woke’ left,” Ellis explained. He is critical of the fact that, while many among the ‘hysterical left’ see Donald Trump as a sexual predator, he “[doesn’t] know” whether or not any women actually came forward with allegations (they had, several years prior). Ellis feels that others are too “worked up.” He has never voted in a Presidential election.

When accused of being right-wing, Ellis replies, “you really have read me wrong.” He was recently profiled for Breitbart.

To his credit, Ellis doesn’t care what you think of him—which is probably for the best. It’s not so difficult to understand his disillusionment with the literary world, considering the magnitude of his former role within it: the most promising freshman Bennington College had ever seen, a prodigy by all definitions. But inherent in any prodigy is youth—the unique impact of accomplishing great things before anyone else gets the chance. His legacy is as much his writing as it is his cocaine-fueled escapes; the personality cult of characters he surrounded himself with, the ‘Brat Pack,’ a full cast of epithets with himself as the bad boy. In White, he identifies that his artistic mission is “to present an aesthetic, things that are true without having to be factual or immutable.” He, like his work, is as much idea as execution.

 

 

Young Bret Easton Ellis

Image Via Rolling Stone

 

When Ellis realized he was no longer young, “something began to crack, and the crack began to spread, and I began to get depressed over this notion of disappearing,” he admits. “I realized, at a certain point, that the younger generation was supplanting me.” That, to clarify, is the younger generation that doesn’t read (even though they do). It’s the generation filled with those who “don’t care about literature.” It’s impossible not to wonder whether or not he’s referring to literature as an abstract concept or simply as a reality he no longer inhabits. It’s true that there may be less of a cult of personality surrounding authors now than there had been in the past—in the 80s, Ellis’ brightest decade. But I am one of the Millennials on the other side of his accusations, and so I do not remember. What is literature to Bret Easton Ellis? What exactly is it that we’ve forgotten?

“Own it, snowflakes,” reads the opening line of Ellis’ blurb, “you’ve lost everything you claim to hold dear.”

 

 

Ellis and his infamous literary 'Brat Pack'

image via The Nation

 

 

 

Personally, I am among the youngest Millennials, born in the last weeks of 1995—that porous landscape between generations, the liminal space for those of us who can remember 9/11 but were still teenagers during the conspicuous rise of ‘identity politics:’ “transgender” mentioned in a State of the Union address, same-sex marriage legalized, racialized abuses of power brought closer to the forefront of our cultural consciousness.

I am not offended to be told that Millennials don’t read (I do, voraciously) or write (I am right now). I am not offended to be called a snowflake, especially considering that, hitting multiple letters on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum, there are far worse things for others to call me. I am curious as to why political outrage qualifies as “hysteria” when Ellis finds none of the same senselessness in his own vitriol, nothing childlike in describing triggering Millennials as “delicious” as “eating frosting.” And what are we to expect? This is the man who made his name from the journalistically-chronicled shocking indifference of a group of drugged-out teenagers in Less Than Zero, written with a callousness and emptiness that time has not bothered to take.

 

"I don't want to care. If I care about things, it'll just be worse, it'll just be another thing to worry about. It's less painful if I don't care."

Image Via Quotefancy

 

“I think I am an absurdist,” he says, which is an odd thing not to know.

Does an author have any obligation to present the truth? Does an author need to consider the larger political climate, the cultural context of a work, as part of its meaning? Is nihilism an artistic statement, or is it a cop-out? Does an author have any obligation to understand the things he’s commenting upon?

Regardless of the answer, it’s clear that Ellis doesn’t.

 

Featured Image Via The Irish Times.

Top 10 Most Fearsome Evildoers in Literature

There’s something fun about bad guys. A memorable villain is just as much a key ingredient of literature as the hero, acting as the antagonist and obstacle in the way of the heroes goals. If done properly, a villain will be just as remembered and often as beloved as the hero, hailed for their command of evil minions, nefarious lines, and the threatening situations they put our plucky main characters in. But who are the best? Who are the cream of the crop among literary bad guys? Well, here are the top ten best and darkest villains in literature!

 

10. Annie Wilkes- ‘Misery’ 

 

A closeup of Annie Wilkes from 'Misery'

Image via Stephen King wiki

Annie Wilkes is a cautionary tale, showcasing how mentally unstable being a ‘superfan’ can make you. When writer Paul Sheldon breaks both legs in an accident, Annie takes him in and begins to nurse him back to health. But slowly, she reveals she’s obsessed with the Misery series Paul writes and the latest book kills off Misery. Annie Wilkes snaps at this and forces Paul to write a new novel that undoes Misery’s death. She subjects him to multiple horrors within her house, such as slicing off Paul’s leg with an axe and stabbing a state trooper who tries to rescue Paul before running him over with a lawnmower. Annie Wilkes grows increasingly psychotic over the course of the novel and just as Paul does, the reader becomes increasing desperate to escape her presence. Annie Wilkes was played by Kathy Bates in the 1990 film adaptation, winning an Oscar for bringing the character to life.

 

9. Patrick Bateman- ‘American Psycho’

 

Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman sits in a business suit on a cell phone

Image via Variety

Debuting in 1991 in the novel American Psycho, Patrick Bateman is a deeply, deeply disturbed man. A young investment banker living in Manhattan during the 1980s, Patrick Bateman is a serial killer who begins the novel in semi-control of his killing urges but spirals completely out of control as the novel progresses. Told from Bateman’s POV, the novel paints him as a racist, a homophobic, a narcissist, and a psychopath. However, Bateman may not even be a serial killer, as the novel frames his crimes as possibly not even having happened after he confesses at the book’s end. Nevertheless, there is no doubt that Bateman is a deeply disturbed man and one whose mental state is at rock bottom, even if he’s a serial killer or not.

 

8. Count Olaf- ‘A Series of Unfortunate Events’

 

The villainous Count Olaf stands with two crows perched on his shoulder and arm

Image via Lemony Snicket wiki

Children’s novels often have brought to life some of the most iconic villains in pop culture and Count Olaf is no exception. The main antagonist for the majority of the series, obsessed with claiming the fortune of the Baudelaire orphans. Over the course of the series, he appears in each location the children find themselves in, from steel mills to a reptile zoo to a carnival. Each time, Count Olaf assumes a new disguise in his pursuit of the kids, fooling everyone but them with his distinct personas. He may be a murderer with a flair for arson but Count Olaf is always a lot of fun, hammy and over the top in his villainy. Yet, at the end of the series, he manages to become a sympathetic figure and even allies with the children against a worse evil before he meets his demise, showing perhaps that he was more complicated than we thought.

 

7. Big brother- ‘1984′ 

A portrait of the dictator 'Big Brother' in a propaganda poster

Image via Wikipedia

Less a character than a symbol of tyranny and oppression, Big Brother is nonetheless the ruling leader of Oceania in 1984Never seen in person, Big Brother might just a symbol of the tyrannical Party but that doesn’t matter. People believe he exists and the Party reinforces this belief to the oppressed populace. Posters decorate the city that bear the now famous slogan ‘Big Brother is watching you’. The message is always clear: Big Brother sees all and if there is dissent, he knows. Big Brother becomes akin to God, a portrait of a tyranny realized at its terrifying conclusion.

 

6. Mr. Croup and Vandemar- ‘Neverwhere’

 

 

Croup and Vandemar, two brutish thugs of inhuman disposition stand next to each other in victorian dress

Image via Pininterest 

 

Croup and Vandemar are a double-act, a pair of villains who are hired to track down the heroes in NeverwhereIt is not made entirely clear what they are but they’re not human, that’s for certain, as they have a habit of eating live animals and sometimes, chunks of furniture! Croup is a small fat man who is possessed with a verbose style of speech while Vandemar is his brutish partner who barely speaks and specializes more in killing things. The pair certainly make a memorable impression whenever they’re onscreen, serving as an excellent and terrifying pair of evil thugs who can’t be stopped by regular weapons.

 

5. Regal Farseer-‘The Farseer Trilogy’

 

The handsome Prince Regal dressed in kingly attire wearing a crown

Regal Farseer is a vain and cruel prince in line to acquire the throne in the fantasy kingdom of Buckeep. However, his plans of ascension are thrown into a snag when a bastard son of his father, Chivalry Farseer, called Fitz (the protagonist) comes to Buckeep. Regal is aware of Fitz’s heritage and plots to kill him. He eventually acquires the throne throughout the trilogy and Fitz is brought into conflict with his half-brother to get it back. Regal embodies jealously, cruelty, and arrogance, being one dark and vicious prince.

 

4. Randall Flagg-‘The Stand’

 

The dark, cloaked figure of Randall Flagg holding a playing card before a red backdrop
Image via Stephen King wiki

 

Described as Stephen King’s ‘ubervillain’, Randall Flagg appears through Stephen King’s multiverse to wreck constant havoc. He first appears in The Standas a demonic cult leader trying to establish a new society filled with his loyal followers after a plague has destroyed the Earth’s population. Flagg seemingly meets his end when his blown up by a nuclear warhead but reappears throughout further Stephen King works, revealing himself to be an immortal sorcerer who travels throughout space and time, his ultimate goal being to climb The Dark Tower to become a god. Assuming a vast number of identities, Flagg is always a manipulative, dark presence who strikes fear whenever he appears, no matter the setting or genre.

 

3. Professor Moriarty- ‘Sherlock Holmes’

 

Professor Moriarty, standing in a hunched stance while dressed in victorian apparel

Image Via Wikipedia

Even if you’ve never read a Sherlock Holmes story, you know this guy. Moriarty appears in The Final Problem, becoming famous as the antagonist who would (temporarily) kill Sherlock Holmes. There, Holmes has penetrated his criminal organization and is forced to flee across the country from Moriarty’s wrath. The pursuit ends on Reichenbach Falls, where the two fight and seemingly plummet to their deaths. Moriarty never appears directly onscreen, as the novel is narrated by Watson who never crosses path with the criminal leader but he is practically an overlord of the London underworld, just as brilliant as Sherlock but uses his mind for evil. It’s no wonder Moriarty was promoted to Holmes’s archenemy, he became such an iconic figure that adaptations see fit to use him as Sherlock’s ultimate enemy.

 

2. Dolores Umbridge- ‘Harry Potter’

 

The seemingly sweet Dolores Umbridge sips tea while dressed in pink

Image via Harry Potter wiki

Forget Voldemort, Dolores Umbridge is a far more evil character because of how real she feels. Seemingly a sweet little lady, Dolores Umbridge reveals herself to be sadistic, cruel, and hits all the buttons to make her hate throughout the series. She interrupts Dumbledore during the Feast, she speaks to the students as if they’re a bunch of small children, she punishes Harry for his misbehaving by making him carve the words “I MUST NOT TELL LIES” over and over again into his skin while she watches with a sweet smile. Dolores hides behind her position of authority to inflict her sadistic whims on Hogwarts and its a sigh of relief when gets what’s coming to her at the end, although some think it wasn’t enough for this woman.

 

1. Sauron- ‘The Lord of the Rings’

 

The black armored figure of Sauron stands tall

Image via LOTR Wiki

The titular Lord of the RingsSauron is unique among fantasy evil overlords in that he never appears directly in the trilogy but his presence consumes everything and he’s responsible for every evil act in one way or another. A former Maiar, a divine angel, Sauron turned away from the light in his lust for power and crafted the One Ring to rule Middle-earth. But the forces of men and elves fought against him, destroying his physical form. Sauron took years to establish himself again, confining himself to his tower in Mordor and building a dark army to conquer Middle-earth while searching to regain the One Ring to claim ultimate victory. Sauron is arguably scarier for how he never appears, only referenced by Gandalf, Saruman, and Gollum but the way they speak of him, how they describe what he is, leaves no doubt that he is one of the greatest villains in literary history. Sometimes, the imagination is more powerful than what we can see.