Happy 4th, bookish tweeters! As promised, I have brought you this week’s bookish tweets, and right on America’s birthday. So, start waving your flag(s) because these bookish tweets will surely color you red, white, and blue!
So, let’s get to it…
Body-Building To The Max
Are you trying but to no avail to get the perfect summer bod that you had always stressed about achieving in the past? Well, here are some go-to tips from a scientific expert on how to do that…
How to get a summer body:
– Grab a shovel
– Head to the nearest graveyard
– Acquire body parts
– Assemble the body parts
– Bring your creature to life using science and immediately become consumed with irrevocable despair
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) June 29, 2020
However, maybe you should just workout your own body rather than going out and stealing parts of dead bodies… just so it wouldn’t cost an arm and leg (ha!) to pay off their loved ones’ grief…
What’s Your Outlet?
Have all that pent-up anger and have zero idea on how to let it all out? Well…
If it was me, I would have simply not burnt down the Library of Alexandria
— Epic Reads ☀️ (@EpicReads) June 30, 2020
Just let that be a lesson you – all of you – to not take out your anger and frustration on one of many homes for our beloved best friends who can get you through anything.
‘Tis The Season To Use Different Greetings
Who needs the boring same-old “Hi, I’m doing fine” response to the age-old question “How are you?” when you can have this whole list of archaic responses! Check out the list below…
Fun ways to respond when someone asks "How are you?"
– "I am wrapp'd in dismal thinkings."
– "Hell is empty and all the devils are here."
– "Chaos is come again."
– [Lies down upon his face.]
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) July 1, 2020
…and you can make this list go on too: just go through Shakespeare’s various plays and you will be sure to find countless others!
Outside = Overrated
You know how you’re psyched for the summer, but you just want nothing more but to stay in and read? (Boy, can I relate?!) Well, if you feel the same, here is a suggestion for a particular spot that’s perfect for reading…
You see what I did there? Sneaky sneaky, I know.
Now, if you happened to read my piece from earlier in the week for last week’s tweets, you may have seen a very similar format in one of those tweets – specifically about Lady Macbeth – to this one. Check out the previous tweet to find it, because everyone likes a callback!
The Real Threat From Which To Be Quarantined
Listen, I’m not trying to devalue the importance of quarantining oneself from others and social distancing in public places. I’m just saying that we have a much, much bigger threat to steer clear away from…
Heathcliff after Catherine dies pic.twitter.com/10FKFQ2Rgu
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) July 1, 2020
So, moral of the story: beware the very much devoted love interest of a person after their death, because I will assure you, there will be many more bodies to join theirs. Stay in and never go out! Ever.
He Said, The Other He Said
You know how you’re trying to explain something to someone and it just flies over their head?
The ghost of Hamlet's father appearing to Hamlet pic.twitter.com/Cf2LnChbSI
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) July 2, 2020
Well, no one can understand that feeling – as well as this meme – better than Hamlet Senior!
Help Is On The Way… So You Hope
Stuck in a situation because of your own pride and can’t seem to get out? Just hang in there, because others have been there too… which may not guarantee they’ll help you get out though…
So you flew too close to the sun and plummeted into the sea as a result of your own hubris pic.twitter.com/5rKaDg08d6
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) July 3, 2020
There there, Icarus. It will all be over soon. (R.I.P. Icarus…)
Also, how fitting that this piece coming out on America’s birthday just happens to have a meme with Captain America in it?! I seriously did not plan it, but I’m glad it worked out this way…
Again, happy 4th of July, and be sure to share your firecrackers (be careful), as well as cotton candy and rainbow-flavored ices and popsicles with everyone…
Featured Image Made via Photoshop