A book on fire

Hilariously Scathing One-Star Book Reviews

When some people don’t like a book, they complain to their friends. When some people don’t like a book, they actively set it on fire. Mostly what they do is type out poorly-worded complaints about what they claim is a poorly-worded excuse for a book. Some popular novels may feel like a ‘waist of you’re time,’ but maybe this list won’t be.

 

This reader had the opportunity to live an interesting life, but War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy took that away from him. It’s a good thing he didn’t waste his only chance at LIVING by then stopping to write a review about irrelevant fictional characters:

 

A negative customer review of 'War and Peace'

 

'War and Peace' by Leo Tolstoy

Images Via Litreactor.com and Amazon.com

 

Anna Karenina author Leo Tolstoy can’t catch a break—but apparently, he can catch these hands:

 

Negative review of 'Anna Karenina' by Leo Tolstoy

 

'Anna Karenina' by Leo Tolstoy

Images Via Litreactor.com and Amazon.com

 

This reviewer warns that 1984 by George Orwell is twice as worse as that Hoxley bastard’s dystopian classic Brave New World, and it’s just as much of a waist:

 

A scathing and yet very badly spelled review of '1984' by George Orwell

 

'1984' by George Orwell

Images Via Litreactor.com and Amazon.com

 

After reading Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, this reviewer made the best of a bad experience:

 

'Fahrenheit 451' review in which a reader describes actively shooting the book with a rifle

 

'Fahrenheit 451' by Ray Bradbury

Images Via Huffingtonpost.com and Amazon.com

 

At least this reviewer of Othello by William Shakespeare could getteth real with us. Good to know that even getting older can’t stop you from staying cool.

 

'Othello' reader says that, although he is old, he cannot understand the old language in Othello. He also says 'Othello' is not cool.

 

'Othello' by William Shakespeare

Images Via Amazon.com

 

The 18 people who found this review helpful were on LSD when they read Ulysses by James Joyce:

 

'Ulysses' book review claims only those on LSD could understand the novel

 

'Ulysses' by James Joyce

Images Via Amazon.com

 

This 50 Shades of Grey by EL James reader has a very talented cat:

 

The reviewer describes 'Fifty Shades' as the worst bit of crap they've seen since visiting a dairy farm at age 7. Also, their cat could write better sex scenes. Get that cat's mind out of the gutter.

 

'Fifty Shades of Grey' by EL James

Images Via Amazon.com

 

Let’s hope this review of the King James Bible isn’t literal:

 

A review of The King James Bible as though it were a novel; apparently, it's less angsty now

 

'The King James Bible'

Images Via Amazon.com

 

This reviewer found The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald to be overall incrediably unsatifying, hardley worth the expense:

 

A reviewer describes burning 'The Great Gatsby' in a flurry of typos

 

'The Great Gatsby' by F Scott Fitzgerald

Images Via Amazon.com

 

Someone who read The Fault in Our Stars by John Green might not understand that cancer can actually kill you:

 

A reviewer claims not to feel sorry for the middle-class white kids (even as they are dying of cancer)

 

'The Fault in Our Stars' by John Green

Images Via Goodreads.com

One reader can accept the factions system in Divergent by Veronica Roth, but her suspension of disbelief stops at public transportation:

 

This reviewer complains about everything, but spends an enormous block of text ranting about how the train works in 'Divergent'

 

'Divergent' by Veronica Roth

Images Via Goodreads.com

 

Featured Image Via Literaryhoarders.com