The first controversy to rattle Republican would-be-congressman Denver Riggleman was the sort of suspect conduct the news typically covers—his possible ties to white Nationalism. It couldn’t get much worse than that. But it could get weirder… and it did.
Image Via Express.co.uk
Riggleman’s Democratic opponent, Leslie Cockburn, exposed his secret back in July as the race heated up. Unfortunately, the secret wasn’t the only thing, uh, exposed. Cockburn shared pictures from Riggleman’s now-private Instagram account—pictures which included censored images of Bigfoot’s genitalia. Regrettably, ‘big’ is the right word to use here. Cockburn posted her accusations on Twitter: “Now [Riggleman] has been exposed as a devotee of Bigfoot erotica. This is not what we need on Capitol Hill.” It might not be what Virginia needed, but it’s what Virginia got. Widely-known author of shockingly weird erotica Chuck Tingle responded to the controversy with a piece of “sizzling human-on-Bigfoot action” entitled Don’t Vote For Virginia Congressional Hopeful Denber Wiggleman Because He Is Full Of Hate, Not Because Bigfoot Makes Him Hard. People voted for him despite both of those things, and he won Virginia’s 5th district.
Image Via Booklistreader.com
Your first question might be—what? Your second question might be something more like this—is Bigfoot erotica really a thing? The short answer? Yes. The long answer is that the Bigfoot erotica literary world extends way beyond Chuck Tingle, author of infamous stories like Bigfoot Settlers Claim My Butthole. Tingle says Bigfoot “gets people hard in a normal way” because the creatures are multifaceted and sensitive… but maybe also because “they are muscular from trotting through the woods.” Virginia Wade‘s Cum for Bigfoot, a sixteen-part series about Bigfoot and one of his parts, has earned her $30,000 per month. Wade writes: “two women were f##king the legend, the beast that was Bigfoot.” Other Bigfoot smut classics include Bigfoot Did Me From Behind and I Liked It by Raven Blackbird. The premise is, apparently, either hilarious or extremely erotic:
26-year old Jessica Fox has loved and admired Bigfoot for as long as she can remember. But never in her wildest dreams did she ever think she’d get to ride Sasquatch’s monstrous 20-inch c#ck. That crazy dream becomes a reality. When Bigfoot slaughters her hapless boyfriend and barges into her tent, Jessica thinks the end is near. What follows is an epic session of love-making that dwarfs Jessica’s previous sexual liaisons with the president and Santa Claus. In essence, Jessica gets fucked from behind by Bigfoot… and she likes it.
Images Via Goodreads.com
This is far from the only example of magical creature smut from Raven Blackbird (let’s assume that these are all pseudonyms). Riggleman, apparently, did not have the foresight to use an edgy pseudonym for his own The Mating Habits of Bigfoot and Why Women Want Him.
Featured Image Via Thedailybeast.com